93. How to Tell When You’re at Your Natural Weight

My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.

Hey there, and welcome to episode 93 of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray, the weight loss coach for runners. And today I’m talking about how to tell when you’re at your natural weight. You know, I talk a lot about weight loss here on the podcast. And I talk about eventually getting to your natural weight, whatever that is for you. But I’ve never really taken the time to explain what that means.

What is your natural weight? What does this even mean? And people have been asking me about this lately. They’re like, Patrick, what does this mean? So I thought it’d be a good idea to dig into this topic here on the podcast today.

Listen, I get it, losing weight is a very challenging and very personal thing, there’s not one right way to do it. Okay, lots of different things work for different people. And the same goes for what your natural weight should be. It’s a very personal thing. And yet, lots of people have different opinions about what your natural weight should be. So in this episode, I’m going to talk about some of the standards we use to determine ideal weight, why they don’t really work for everyone, what natural weight really means and how to tell when you’re at your natural weight.

But first, if you liked this podcast, please come check out the Running Lean podcast community. On Facebook. It’s a group that goes hand in hand with the podcast, it extends the conversation, it gives you a voice, you can ask questions, get answers, and be a part of a very positive, very supportive, very encouraging group on Facebook, just search for Running Lean community on Facebook and join us in the fun.

And then here’s a message that I received from a listener the other day on Instagram. And I just have to tell you guys that I love getting messages like this, and I get them all the time. And I really, really appreciate it. And it means a lot to me. And it means that what I’m doing is having an impact on you. And so I really appreciate these kinds of messages from you guys.

Anyway, this person wrote, “Hey, I really appreciate your podcasts. I found it at a troubling time in my life. And you’re helping me get my mind straight and help me motivate myself to be a better me.” Thank you. Wow, I love that. This is why I do what I do, guys.

Okay. Speaking of what I do, people ask me how they can work with me two ways you can get more out of the Running Lean program. Number one is the Running Lean coaching group. This is my group where we meet once a week, and we do a group Zoom call, I do a little bit of coaching and training in the group.

But it’s a place where you get to ask questions. It’s a place where you get to feel supported, and you get to have your voice heard and get some answers and hear from other people like you that are going through the same kinds of things. Each month, we kind of dig into a different topic.

The month of October, we’re talking about injury prevention, we’re talking about building strength and increasing our flexibility. And I’ve got a couple of special guests coming in to share some of their expertise on the subject. So it’s going to be super fun.

If you want to join the group, you can do that at any time, just go to lunch runningleanpodcast.com/join. And then the other way to work with me is you can hire me as your coach, I’m a one on one coach, this is what I do. working one on one with me is probably the best way to get whatever results you’re looking for.

If you want to become a different person you want to, you know, make some sort of transformation in your health and fitness, having a coach there to help you every step of the way is probably the best way to do it. And hey, it doesn’t even have to be me, it can be anybody, any coach that you feel like you have a connection with. Okay, so I just want you to know that coaching is extremely effective, extremely effective.

And when you sign up for one on one coaching with me, you also get access to the group calls and all the group stuff too. So it’s kind of a win win. If you want to apply for coaching, just go to runningleanpodcast.com/apply.

Okay, let’s talk about this natural weight thing. What does this even mean? People ask me all the time, like what is your natural weight mean? And I thought about it. I’m like, I guess I really haven’t taken the time to explain this very well. Some people keep asking about it. So I thought I would take the time today to do that. So we’re going to talk about what what your natural weight means and how you can sort of tell if you’re there.

How do you know? When you’re at your natural way? What does what does all this mean? Okay? First I want to go back a little bit and talk about sort of some standards that we use to determine ideal weight. And one of those standards, kind of the big standard out there you guys have heard of is probably BMI, right? This is your height to weight ratio. That’s all it is.

It’s like how tall are you? How much do you weigh? Oh, you know, you’re either this either says you’re, you know, average or below average or above average, or is it’ll say you’re overweight or obese or whatever. And this is not a really good measure of of where you are on the health and fitness scale because it’s not considering things like your age, or your gender, or your muscle mass, or your body type, or whether you’re an athlete or not.

When I plugged my numbers into the BMI calculator on the National Institute of Health’s website, it says I’m overweight, I’m in the overweight category, because I weigh like 175 pounds. I’m 5’11.

And I’m just going to tell you right now, in my opinion, I’m exactly where I want to be, and I am not overweight, my body composition kind of looks like I’m about a 12.9% body fat right now. And this is down from about 15% at the beginning of this year. So I’ve gained about 12 pounds of muscle and lost some percentage of fat, I can’t remember the exact number, but I’ve lost like 8 or 10 pounds of fat or something like that. So I’m like, if you look at like some other ways of measuring your your body composition, I’m in the excellent category like gold star for me, okay.

And another example, and I’ve mentioned my son Jack before, he’s a bodybuilder and this dude is huge, right? He’s the same height as me. But he weighs probably 25 pounds more than me, he would be considered like almost on the obese side of things, according to the National Institutes of Health, but he’s super fit. He doesn’t have a ton of body fat on him. He has a ton of muscle, right?

So when we look at BMI, it’s not telling the whole story, there’s a lot more stuff going on. And there are other like, ideal weight calculators that you can find online, and they will factor in things like your age and your gender. But it’s still like age, gender, height, weight. That’s about it. You know, there’s just more to the story. Okay.

So this is like the one big standard out there is like BMI. Another standard, and I’m using this word standard in quotes here. Okay, I’m doing finger quotes right now, the other standard we tend to go by is what other people think our weight should be. Everyone seems to have an opinion about what your weight should be, right?

Even well-meaning people like your husband or your wife, they might say things like, you don’t need to lose weight, you look fine. You know, I love you just the way you are, oh, I don’t want you to get too skinny. When are you going to stop losing weight? Like these things are not helpful. These kinds of statements are not helpful. These people they mean well, but they don’t get decide what your body weight should be.

And when people start to say things like this, I just have to tell you, when people see you start to lose weight and maybe get healthier, it makes them uncomfortable. And when they say something like, “You don’t need to lose weight, you’re fine. You know, you need to eat something, don’t get too skinny. You’re too skinny.”

Like people will say these things. And they’re saying this stuff because they feel uncomfortable about themselves. So these kinds of statements are really about them and not about you at all. They start questioning their own choices. They start questioning their own body weight to they start questioning how they feel about themselves.

And when you’re on a different path than them, maybe you’re improving yourself, they start to feel a little uncomfortable. So when it comes to other people not feeling comfortable about themselves and trying to sort of like look at you and maybe pull you down a little bit.

There’s this theory called crabs in a bucket and it’s just a funny thing. And it’s like if you have one crab in a bucket, it’ll it’ll crawl out of the bucket and it’ll figure out a way to sort of grab on to the edge and sort of crawl out of that bucket. Okay, apparently this is what crab fishermen do or whatever they figured this out.

But when you put more than one crab in the bucket, as that one starts to crawl out, another crab will pull it down, the other crab in the bucket will pull it down, because it doesn’t want it to escape. It’s like, oh, you’re not going anywhere, you’re gonna stay right down here with me.

And this is the way people in our lives are, sometimes they’re like crabs in the bucket, right? They pull us down to their level, they pull us down, because us leaving and going somewhere else and getting out of the bucket, it feels uncomfortable for them. Okay.

So just understand that when other people have opinions about what you should weigh, or what your diet should be like, or how you look or whatever, that’s all about them and not about you. Right, and you don’t have to listen to those people.

Okay, another sort of like standard of weight out there. It’s not necessarily like a standard of weight. But it’s a theory, it’s called the set point theory. And the set point theory states that our bodies have sort of a preset weight, that is hardwired into our DNA, it’s like a genetic thing. And according to the setpoint theory, our weight, and how much we can change our weight from this, whatever set point is, might be limited.

And the set point theory says that some of us have higher weight points, and some of us have lower weight points, and then it’s like our bodies are fighting to stay within this range that we have, okay. So your weight may go up or down temporarily, but eventually, it’s going to try to return to whatever this comfortable like setpoint is, okay.

So you may gain some weight, you may lose some weight, but there are these biological signals that are being sent to help you stay at this, whatever is like normal for you, okay. And according to the setpoint rate, you can change the setpoint. Right. So it’s not something that is like, necessarily fixed, but it requires a little bit of work.

So a lot of people can lose weight and keep it off for good. Like many, many, many people do this, right? A lot of people find it very difficult to but your your metabolic setpoint, you know, maybe right now, maybe like 50 pounds overweight, basically, right? That just because that’s where you’ve been for a long time.

And to change that setpoint, you have to lose some weight, and you have to keep it off for a period of time. And once you keep it off for a period of time, your body begins to adapt to this new normal sort of setpoint, this becomes your new normal setpoint. And the longer you stay at the lower weight, the easier it is to maintain.

Now, I just have to say, this is very important. This is just a theory, it’s not really proven in science. And I don’t necessarily think this is 100% true, because I’ve seen many, many people, in my experience and my coaching experience, I’ve helped many, many people to maintain a lower weight without much of an issue. I think maintaining your weight has more to do with your mental and emotional states and your relationship with food than it does with some hardcore, hard coded like DNA setpoint or whatever.

Okay, so that’s just something I wanted to throw out there as something some people have mentioned and asked about, and is this, you know, kind of regulating our natural weight? And there may be some evidence there that says, yeah, could have something to do with it. There’s also some evidence that’s like, no, it doesn’t really matter. Like, you can change that. Okay.

So I don’t believe these ways that we measure, quote, unquote, ideal weight, I don’t think they’re super helpful, because they don’t work across the board for everybody perfectly. They might get you in a ballpark. But then again, it’s like what, what is your natural weight? What’s gonna work for you as an individual? And these standards, they don’t factor in things like your body type, your body shape, how athletic you are, how much muscle mass you have, how long have you been at this weight, etc. So this is why I kind of use the word natural weight instead.

And so what do I mean by natural weight? And how do you know when you get there? Well, your natural weight is something that is very personal to you. It’s not how you measure up according to some government chart. It’s not how you compare yourself to people on Instagram. It’s where you feel good about yourself. Your natural weight is where you feel your healthiest.

So many people come to me and they’re like, I just want to feel healthy. I don’t feel healthy right now. So they would just want to get healthy. So when you feel healthy when you feel your healthiest, then you’re probably going to be close to your natural weight. When you feel confident about yourself. You’re probably getting close to your natural weight.

Lots of people don’t feel confident about their body. They’re always trying to hide their body. They wear baggy clothes, they don’t like being in photos. They do things to cover up their body because they don’t feel confident they don’t feel comfortable. When you feel comfortable and confident in your body and your skin, you’re getting close to your natural weight.

Can you wear clothes that flatter your body, maybe show off your body? Maybe you rock a bikini, this could be a sign that you’re at your natural weight. Can you wear those jeans you used a lot, but the ones that make your butt look amazing? Yeah, that’s you feeling good about yourself, where you feel sexy, where you feel like where you have this positive self image, where you can look at yourself in the mirror and like what you see.

What do you see when you look at yourself in the mirror today? Are you seeing just flaws and wrinkles and sagging skin and all the stuff that you hate about yourself? When you look in the mirror and you like what you see this is a good sign that you’re at your natural weight, where you feel good about your whole self.

And this is not necessarily a number on the scale. If you’ve like been listening here, I haven’t really mentioned the number on the scale, or how much weight you should weigh or what you know that number should be for you. It’s more about how you feel about yourself. And it’s also where you feel comfortable maintaining your weight. When you can easily maintain your weight, with little effort, where it all just feels pretty easy and effortless. You’re getting there. You know, if you’re busting your ass every day at the gym and starving yourself just to maintain your weight. That’s not easy. That’s not effortless, that’s not sustainable. You know, that’s, that’s a struggle.

When you stop the struggling and you just feel good about yourself. This is when you’re at your natural weight. And honestly, only you will know, when you get there, it may not be the number you think it should be on that scale, it might be more might be less, like, let’s say you, your your ideal is like 140 pounds, you’re like you know, if I can just get to 140, I’m gonna feel great about myself.

But then you get to that number and you keep losing a little bit of weight. And maybe you get to 135 pretty easily and you kind of stay there great, that’s kind of your natural weight for you. Maybe this is easy and effortless for you. And you can maintain this boom, you’re there good.

So maybe you think you should be at 140. And you sort of hit a good place with yourself at 145, this feels good to you. You’re confident, you’re happy, you feel healthy. You love how you look in that bikini, boom, you’re at your natural weight, right? Only you will know when you get there. It’s like how you see yourself on the inside matches what you see on the outside, then you know you’re there.

And I’m guessing that you may have never thought of it this way before but your natural weight is a decision. It’s a decision that you get to make and only you can make this decision only you can decide what your natural weight is for you. You get to make the decision for yourself, not your wife, not your husband, not your personal trainer. Only you I want you to take ownership of this, I want you to take ownership of your weight, your health, your fitness, all of that.

I want you to be empowered to make your own decisions about what’s best for you because only you know what’s best for you. I don’t even know what’s best for you. When I’m working with clients we decide you know around where they should be. But we usually kind of target a range and then we see where they feel the best.

So even I can’t make this decision for you. It has to come from you. And this may sound weird, but like you can’t decide this today, what your natural weight is going to be. You’ll know it when you get there. Because it’s more about how you feel than anything else. It’s not about a number, you know.

So you might think, Oh, it’s 140. But then you’re like, I don’t feel good at 140. And you won’t know it until you get there. So the important thing is is to do the work to commit to the process. Commit to learning and growing and bettering yourself every single day. Commit to being disciplined about your nutrition, being disciplined about exercise, sticking to the plan no matter what. And you’ll get there and you’ll know it when you’re there.

Now one more thing I wanted to share. I want to make sure that you guys understand that this is not in contrast to body positivity. Body positivity means loving yourself exactly as you are right now. No matter what that weight is, the weight doesn’t matter. It means you don’t look in the mirror and criticize yourself. Doesn’t mean you’re disgusted with yourself or ashamed of who you are because you weigh a certain number of pounds, whatever.

It means taking a good long look at yourself in the mirror and loving every inch of who you are right now, this is what body positivity means. You have to love and accept yourself exactly as you are always.

And here’s the part a lot of people miss when it comes to this idea of body positivity. A lot of people think you can’t love yourself as you are and want to change it like it’s like these two things have to be mutually exclusive. And they’re not.

You can feel amazing about how you look right now and still want to lose some weight. If that’s what you want for yourself. You can love and accept yourself exactly as you are right now, and still want to change. They’re not mutually exclusive ideas. It’s not an either, or you can have both.

In fact, if your goal is to lose weight, you can’t do it by beating yourself up every day, you’re gonna have a much, much harder time losing weight. If you’re talking trash about yourself all the time, you can’t hate yourself thin.

And if you’re comfortable where you are right now. Awesome, do you, you don’t have to be skinny, you don’t have to be lean. I know this is the Running Lean podcast. But this is not a mandate, okay? You get to decide what feels good for you.

You know, I talk a lot about becoming a lean runner about losing weight. This message is for people who want that for themselves. I’m in no way saying that everyone has to lose weight. I’m in no way judging anybody for how much they weigh. It’s not about what I think. It’s about what you think about yourself.

The beautiful thing about being a human being is that you get to decide who you are, you get to decide what you do, you get to decide what you want for yourself. And only you can decide what your natural way should be not a BMI chart, not your husband, not your friends, not someone you follow on Instagram. Only you can decide what your natural weight is. And you’ll know when you get there.

This is what I want for you. I want you to show up every day, and do the work and love who you are in the mirror every day work to change if that’s what you want for yourself. And when you get to that place where you feel good and you feel confident, and you feel comfortable. And you’re rocking that bikini or that pair of jeans or whatever it is for you, whatever.

However you want to measure what your natural weight is for you and where you feel good about yourself. When you get there, you’re going to know it. And this is what I want for you. I just want you to to know when you get there. I want you to do the work to get there and love yourself through the whole process. Cool. Awesome.

That’s all I got for you today. Remember, October is strength and flexibility and injury prevention month over in the Running Lean coaching group. We’re going to be talking about building strength becoming more flexible, so we can stave off injuries. Runners get injured a lot. We want to make sure we avoid that.

Okay, so just go to runningleanpodcast.com/join. And I hope you’ll join us over in the Running Lean coaching group. That’s all I got for you today. Love you all keep on Running Lean. Talk to you soon.

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