Running Lean with Patrick McGilvray
Self-sabotage is one of those terms that you hear and you think you have a pretty good handle on what it means. But do you really? Because if you find yourself engaging in self-sabotaging behavior, …
Continue Reading about 80. Understanding and Eliminating Self-Sabotage →
My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.
Hey there, and welcome to episode 80 of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray, the weight loss coach for runners and today, I’ve got a fun topic for you understanding and eliminating self sabotage. Self sabotage is one of those things that we hear the term and you think you have a pretty good handle on what it means. But do you really, because if you find yourself engaging in self sabotaging behavior, then you’re not sure why you keep doing this to yourself, then you may not understand it as well as you think.
Because until you have a better understanding of what self sabotage really is, and how it shows up in your life, you can’t change it, or you can’t prevent it from happening. So in this episode, I’m going to help you to understand what self sabotage really is, how it prevents you from achieving your goals, why you do it, and how you can eliminate it from your life. Cool, it’s gonna be fun.
And just really quick, if you like this podcast, please come check us out on Facebook, we have this awesome community, the Running Lean podcast community. And the the Facebook group goes hand in hand with the podcast. It’s a place where you can ask questions and get answers, and get some support. And feel the love, feel the encouragement, get some inspiration, we talked about running, we talked about mindset stuff in there, I do a little coaching and training in there every week.
And right now it’s July, and we’re doing the dry July challenge. So it’s a place where we are taking the month of July and eliminating alcohol. And the group is a place where you can you know, kind of get supported through that journey if this is something you’re interested in. And you’re just you know, now hearing about this, you can still join in and, and and start with us it’s it’s kind of fun.
It’s not like alcohol is bad, or, you know, it’s not about good or bad. It’s not about moral judgments. It’s just about, you know, I want to see what it feels like to take a break from alcohol, maybe I want to improve my health or my running performance. And I just want to see how this will work. So come join us. It’ll be fun. It’s all about fun, right? Just search for the Running Lean community on Facebook, and join us over there. Cool.
And listen, I understand how overwhelming a lot of these topics can feel. You know, we talked about changing your mindset, changing habits, changing your, the way you’re eating, changing your exercise regimen, starting to do some strength training, getting into running, improving your running performance, all of these things can feel quite honestly overwhelming. And it can feel very confusing. And there’s a lot of conflicting information out there. And I get all of that.
That’s why I am a coach. That’s why I coach people every day to kind of navigate all of that stuff, and make it make sense for you in a way that will work for you. Coaching isn’t about you know, here’s what you do is like one thing that we do, we just here’s a list of stuff to do. And it works for everybody. It’s not like that at all. It’s about figuring out what works for you as an individual, what works for you, and your goals and your lifestyle and your likes and dislikes and your you know running performance and all these things we want to support ports support you where you are today and help you get to where you want to be tomorrow. So if you’re ever interested in working with me as your coach, just go to runningleanpodcast.com/apply.
And you’ll have to apply for coaching because I don’t work with everybody. You know, I want to I want to have a conversation with you. I want to see if this is a good fit for you. I want you to see if I’m a good fit for you for you. Like you may think like well, I thought Patrick would be awesome to work with. But then I started talking to him and I don’t think so.
I haven’t had that happen yet, by the way, but you know, it’s possible. But anyway, it just can’t hurt to have a conversation about coaching and what that would look like for you. Okay, so I’m here for you. If you ever want to do that, just go to runningleanpodcast.com/apply, and we can talk about it. Cool. Awesome. All right.
I want to get into this topic today. I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks now. And I’m excited about this topic because I think it’s really important to understand what self sabotage really is. How you do it, why you do it, and how you can prevent it.
And really one of the biggest keys here and the biggest takeaway from this episode is going to be that when you understand how self sabotage is showing up for you, and some of these things I’m going to talk about you may not have heard of before, and it may surprise you how you might be self sabotaging yourself or why you self sabotage.
But one of the keys is that when you understand what’s happening, just right there, this can be life changing for you, this can absolutely help you to just eliminate it from happening going forward. Okay, so just a really having a deep understanding of what’s happening with you and how you self sabotage is key to fixing the problem. Okay.
So the reason I really started getting into this and got excited about talking about this is because I was reading a book called The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, and he talks about in the book, this this issue called, he calls it the upper limit problem. And this is a problem where we all have some sort of self imposed upper limit. And when we reach that upper limit, and we try to go past that upper limit, things get very uncomfortable.
So we might have a self imposed upper limit of how much happiness we want to experience or how much success we can experience or how much you know how healthy we can be, or how much wealth we can have, you know, how much money we can have in the bank, or how much love we can experience any, it can be positive things, too. It’s not just about, you know, how much, you know, adversity can you handle it’s not about that, it’s about like, good things, right.
So we have this self imposed sort of upper limit, and when we hit that upper limit, we get very, very uncomfortable. And here’s why. Because your brain sees this upper limit, as unsafe, as unfamiliar. And as something that maybe it’s dangerous for you, you know, it’s out of your comfort zone. And so, you might be like feeling really good and feeling all this happiness, and you’re maybe you’re sticking to your eating plan, and you’re losing some weight, and you’re feeling really good.
And your brain is like, wait a minute, what is happening here, this is not normal, this doesn’t feel right, this feels uncomfortable, this place of like, everything is going well. And so what will happen is, and you don’t even know you’re doing this, but subconsciously, you pull yourself back away from that upper limit, you pull yourself back to what feels comfortable, what feels familiar, and what feels to your primitive brain safe for you. Back to your comfort zone, right?
Some examples of how this shows up for people is, you know, kind of what I was just mentioning, you start to lose weight, you’re starting to feel good, you’re sticking to your plan. And all of a sudden, you find yourself, you know, face first into a Boston Cream Pie. And you’re like, what is happening? Why am I doing this to myself? I didn’t want to eat this. But I find myself, you know, with a cupcake in my face, like, what am I doing here?
Because subconsciously, you don’t even know you’re doing this, you think, you know, it’s all just happening to you. But you’re, you’re doing this to yourself, okay, but it’s subconscious. It’s not within your awareness. It’s like outside of your awareness. Okay. Subconsciously, you’re just trying to get back to what, what you know, and what is familiar to you, and what feels safe to you and what feels comfortable for you.
And that is a certain weight, like, let’s say you, you know, you’re you’re on this track to lose 40 pounds, all right, and you haven’t lost, you know, you haven’t been down 40 pounds in 40 years or something like that. And it’s been, you know, 10 years since you’ve lost 20 pounds. And so you start to get close to that 20 pound mark, and all of a sudden, you know, this feels really unfamiliar and very uncomfortable for you.
And so subconsciously, you will do something, you’ll start over eating, you’ll start eating a bunch of crap, just to get yourself back to where you feel comfortable. Isn’t this sort of insidious? It’s very sneaky. What happens what our brains are doing to us here, okay, but we have to understand what’s going on in order to fix it.
Another example is, you’ve probably heard this one before people that win the lottery. So people that are, you know, have, you know, let’s say middle class, you know, they have you know, they they’re not used to having a lot of money, right? They’re just like, whatever, living paycheck to paycheck, they win the lottery, they get millions of dollars.
And I think the statistics are something like this. 60% of these people within two years are back to where they were financially, before they won the lottery, like they have this pull back to their comfort zone. Because having millions of dollars in the bank, investing it and making it grow, and like all this other stuff feels so uncomfortable for them. It’s so unfamiliar.
And they’re, you know, they just want to go back to what feels good and what feels comfortable for them. And everybody else, maybe even them would look at this situation and go, you’re crazy. How can you do this to yourself, this is total self sabotage.
But in reality, it’s so hard to discern what’s happening, because it feels like it’s automatic, it’s feels like it’s just happening to you. But it’s very, it’s very sneaky. And it’s subconscious that’s happening. It’s your subconscious at work, it’s your primitive brain at work, we have to just have this awareness to understand what’s going on here.
Another way this shows up is, you know, let’s say you want to quit drinking, and you find yourself doing well, for some time for some period of time, you might like, you know, we’re on day, eight now of the dry July challenge. And there’s people that are doing really well, and they haven’t had a drink in eight days.
And maybe some of these people will find themselves, you know, drinking tonight, and they don’t understand why. And it could just be that that feeling that they’re feeling and experiencing of like not being drunk or not being buzzed or not being hungover, whatever, that doesn’t feel normal to them. It doesn’t feel, you know, familiar. It’s not what they’re used to feels uncomfortable.
And your primitive brain just wants to go back to what feels comfortable. And so your primitive brain will be like you need to drink. And you might think, well, this is a dumb idea. Why am I doing this? And you might just find yourself doing it anyway.
When I first started, when I first stopped drinking, many years ago, I remember waking up feeling good. For the first time in a long time, you know, waking up, not feeling hungover. And this felt very uncomfortable for me. I had all this energy, I felt very clear headed. I wasn’t sick to my stomach. And I did not like that feeling. This was so uncomfortable for me. And so not normal it’s not funny.
Like I remember driving to work every day. And I had like a 30 minute commute or whatever to work. And I just remember everyday thinking, man I wish I just felt better. I wish I felt I wish I wasn’t so sick, driving to work, but then I would you know, then I stopped drinking. And then I was like, Oh my gosh, what am I feeling now as I’m driving to work, but this feels so uncomfortable.
I feel so like jittery and like, you know, clear headed like, this is crazy, you know, so that that felt very foreign to me and very uncomfortable for me. And here’s the thing, happiness can feel very uncomfortable. Feeling good, feels uncomfortable for us. We’re not wired, to seek out happiness and to pursue happiness.
We’re not wired to pursue joy, and to pursue love and to pursue success and to pursue good health. We’re wired to pursue comfort. This is not a bad thing, okay, you just have to understand that this is what’s going on in your brain. And this is something that we’ve evolved over millions of years, as human beings, we have this natural instinct to seek out the familiar to seek out what is comfortable for us to always be running back to the safety of what’s comfortable, even though comfort may be what’s bad for us.
It doesn’t matter, even though we know like I want to, you know, improve my relationship with my romantic partner. And so I’m going to like, you know, try to you know, I want more love, and more joy in our relationship. And then when you start to get that, it’s like, whoa, this feels really weird and feels uncomfortable.
I’m just going to pick a fight with them just to make sure we go back to where we were before, where everything was comfortable and familiar to us where we’re fighting all the time. Right? This is kind of insidious.
Now we just have to understand this is the way your brain works. It’s not a bad thing. It’s no moral judgment here. This is just how our brains are wired. And it’s okay. All change anytime we want to change anything, it’s somewhat uncomfortable. All change is uncomfortable until it becomes familiar to us. All change is uncomfortable until it becomes more familiar to us.
So we have this thing, and I see this all the time with with clients who want something for themselves, they want to lose weight, let’s say, you know, they want to quit drinking, they want to run faster. So they want something they’ve wanted this for a long time. That wanting is very familiar, it’s part of who they are. Right.
So maybe they’ve wanted to lose weight for 20 years, they’ve tried all kinds of things, and they haven’t worked. But they keep wanting it. And they keep having this wanting this wanting becomes the familiar thing for them, the wanting of the thing, the wanting of the goal becomes their comfort zone, they’re just comfortable wanting this thing, you know, you may want to quit drinking, and you want to quit drinking. And that’s just where you’ve been for a long time.
Or maybe you want to get in shape, and you’ve been wanting to get in shape for many years. You’ve wanted it for so long. It’s now it’s just a comfortable and familiar thing this wanting. But then you get the thing, you get in shape, you do quit drinking, you lose the weight. And now you start to you have to make this shift from the wanting to the having that feels really uncomfortable for people.
Okay, because you’re just so used to wanting something you’re so used to wanting, you know, to reach this goal, that having it feels weird and feels uncomfortable and feels unfamiliar and feels unsafe. I, you know, you you may have experienced this, if you’ve ever set a big goal for yourself, like running a marathon, you know, and you cross the finish line of that marathon and it feels so amazing.
But then all of a sudden, you feel sort of let down and you feel uncomfortable, and you feel weird and, and you’re like I need another goal, I need to put something else on the calendar, I need a bigger goal. This was my experience for sure. I ran my first real big race I ever ran was a 10k. And I remember thinking, oh my god, I just I’ve been training for this for so long. And now I’m out of the habit and it’s done. Now I feel uncomfortable having this thing like I have to want something else.
So then I was like I’m gonna train for a marathon. And then I needed something else. And I started, you know, training for ultra marathons. And then I was like, I want something else. And I started training for triathlons and Ironman and I want to run 50 Miles 100 Miles and in the wanting can go on and on and on. And it feels uncomfortable when we get the thing because now we’re not, we’re not in that wanting place anymore. Okay?
You’ve gotten so good at wanting that having it just seems too big or too scary or just weird or uncomfortable for us, okay. And when we get close to reaching a goal, sometimes we will self sabotage will pull ourselves back from achieving the goal so that we don’t get it so that we don’t have it so that we don’t have to make that switch from the wanting to have.
So you might be close to losing weight. And you might think to yourself, like you know, you don’t really deserve this, like who do you think you are? What are people gonna think of me? Or are I’m really not good enough, I’m not going to be able to sustain this. This is really not for me, this might be for other people, but this is not who I am.
All of these thoughts are going to come up and all of these things are going to come up and they’re going to make you want to go running back to safety, running back to what feels safe and comfortable and familiar for you, which is the wanting.
And so you’re just going to continue with the wanting and you’ll just go go through that your whole life. I work with people every day who are like I want this so bad, Patrick. All right, cool. And we start to make some progress and they find themselves month after month, week after week, whatever it is just self sabotaging.
They don’t understand why this is a big part of it. Because having the thing just feels too uncomfortable for them. Well, now that I’ve lost the weight, how am I going to make it work? How am I going to sustain it? And a lot of times it’s just just keep doing what you’re doing.
If you desire you lost the weight and this is how you’re going to keep it off right it’s not a big mystery there. But we get so used to the wanting that the having just seems too too uncomfortable to deal with for us. And I think part of it is like we have this idea that once we get somewhere once we have the thing that we can just coast we can just like cruise, put it in a cruise control and we don’t have to work anymore at it.
So the discomfort you feel around having something I think that’s increased by this false belief that when you get the thing that you know you’ve been chasing for so long that you can just coast like when you reach your goal weight then you can go back to eating whatever you want. When you hit your marathon PR then running is you can just coast like running. It would just be so much easier, and you can just, you know, he pretty much no effort anymore, right?
Or let’s say you quit drinking for 30 days, and you hit 30 days, and then all of a sudden, something’s gonna happen where you just no longer gonna crave alcohol anymore. And you know, I have to do any work around this again. And the truth is, none of this is true, like the work is ongoing, right, you don’t get to some destination, and you have your thing, you have your goal, you’ve reached your, your goal, and then your work is done. And you, you know, can just rest and just chill and cruise control, right?
It doesn’t really work that way. Sorry. It’s just not right. This is, you know, the, the work is ongoing. You know, it’s how you live your life from here on out. Like, if you change your diet, so that you’re, you’re losing weight, and you’re feeling good, and you’re fueling your runs properly, and you’re becoming the healthiest version of you. That’s not something you stopped doing. It’s just not like there’s no, there’s no destination, there’s no finish line that you’re crossing, and then you can go back to doing what you were doing before.
There’s no “there”, that’s better than here. Okay, there’s only here. And that’s okay, and what you’re doing right now, if you’re on this, on this journey of self discovery, if you’re on this journey of personal growth, if you’re on this journey of becoming the healthiest, most badass version of you, then that is your journey from here on out. And that’s cool. That’s okay, that’s good.
We want to be on this journey, we’ll want to keep learning and growing and exploring becoming more always. So when, when it comes down to it, self sabotage is really a product of a lack of self awareness, you just don’t understand what’s happening, you just don’t understand the way your brain is working. Right.
And when you don’t understand what’s going on in your brain, it just can seem like everything is happening to you. Like, you know, everything’s happening to you. You know, when you have the self awareness, when you understand how your thoughts create your feelings, and your feelings, drive your actions. This is when you can start taking back control. This is when you understand that you have the power to change whatever you want in your life.
And psychologists call this type of self awareness, they call it emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand, interpret, and respond to your thoughts and feelings in an enlightened and in an in a healthy way. And so the root of self sabotage is really is a lack of emotional intelligence, the root of self sabotage is a lack of self awareness. But when you have self awareness and emotional intelligence, it kind of looks like that.
So emotional intelligence is like you have a feeling, you have this feeling inside you that maybe you have a feeling like anger, like you understand what the feeling is, you can name it, I have, I’m angry, I have an urge to drink something or to eat something, I’m having a craving, these are all feelings, I’m stressed. This is a feeling I’m bored.
And then you understand that you have a thought that caused that feeling, you know, you maybe you’re thinking you know, a drink sure would take the edge off right now or eating this cookie will probably make me feel better. Or my husband should show more support. For me, these are thoughts that cause feelings, my husband should show more support for me might cause you to feel anger.
And so you have a feeling you understand what it is you can name it, you know the thought that’s causing the feeling. And then you allow that feeling to just be there without having to do anything to change it or to make it go away. This is what emotional intelligence looks like. You can have a feeling you understand what it is where it’s coming from, that you’re having these thoughts that are causing the feeling. And then you don’t have to do anything about it.
You can just have a feeling of wanting to drink or not drink, you can have the feeling of you know, wanting to eat the cookie, but don’t eat the cookie. You could have the feeling of anger at your husband and you don’t yell at him. Even though you’re angry with him. You can just be angry. And that’s cool. This is what emotional intelligence looks like.
And honestly, it’s just one of those things that you have to practice because it feels kind of terrible at first, until you get better at it. Because it’s so uncomfortable. It’s so unfamiliar and you’re in this place and you’re outside your comfort zone because all of a sudden things are coming up and you just got to deal with it. You just got to let it be there. Just allow it to be there. Allow that anger to be there without doing anything about it without acting on it.
But you practice it and you get better at it. And then you practice it some more and you get, it gets easier for you. And it becomes just a part of who you are. Emotional Intelligence is something you can learn, and practice and get good at. And listen, you’re already doing this in other areas of your life, like, you know, your co worker sends you a nasty email and you just want to punch them in the face, but you don’t, you don’t punch them in the face, even though you feel like it, you got angry, you’re feeling the anger, you understand, it’s just a feeling and that you don’t have to act on it. Right?
Because you know, there’s like negative consequences that go along with this, you probably get fired, or, you know, get go to jail or something. And the same goes for sticking with your eating plan or not taking a drink, you can still feel like you want to drink, you can still feel a craving for a cookie and not eat the cookie. You can just be there with that urge to drink and not do anything about it. Just be there. It will feel uncomfortable. It will. It’s cool. Just feel uncomfortable. No biggie.
I was just talking to someone last night who was telling me she was really proud of herself because she was sitting at dinner with friends and she’s trying not to do sugar and flour right now. And there was a you know, basket of bread, they just kept putting these baskets of bread in front of her at this restaurant.
And she just looked at the bread and was like, nope, not doing it. And it felt uncomfortable. But she just just let it be there. Just let it let the discomfort be there. And just went on with you know, talking with their friends and eating dinner and all this other stuff with all this bread just staring at her in the face calling out her name, eat me. Just didn’t do anything about it. You know it wasn’t comfortable, but she got through it.
And the more you practice stuff like that, the better you get at it, the more the more you practice not drinking when you feel like taking a drink like you may be at a party and you don’t know anybody there and you feel super uncomfortable. You’re like I just know a drink would sure make make things easier here.
Don’t do it, just feel uncomfortable. Be the uncomfortable person at the party. You know what other people are probably uncomfortable to. But is that drink really going to help you in that situation? Probably not. Maybe you can just go talk to somebody, you know, just talk to one person, ask them, you know what they do ask them about their family, their kids, whatever. Just you don’t have to drink, you don’t have to make yourself feel comfortable all the time. It’s okay to feel uncomfortable.
So understanding this emotional intelligence piece is so key and understanding the that your thoughts create your feelings and your feelings drive your actions. This is key to ending self sabotaging behavior. The key to changing anything in your life really, is to practice a different pattern, you got to practice a different thought feeling action pattern, you have to train yourself to prefer habits that are good for you.
Like you have to make the good habits familiar to you. And they won’t be easy until they become familiar won’t be comfortable until they become familiar to you. So you have to practice doing it. Like you know, not eating the bread. That’s a good habit. Right? If you don’t eat bread, and everybody else is eating bread, you got to practice not eating the bread. And then that’ll become easier for you. And it’ll become more familiar to you.
And when you do this and you practice it, you get good at it, you expand what’s comfortable for you, you your comfort zone gets larger, you expand your comfort zone. And listen, it’s not enough to know what you should be doing. You know, it’s not about good habits versus bad habits. It’s not about being a good person or a bad person. It’s never about a moral judgment. Never.
It’s just about changing what’s familiar to you. So don’t judge yourself. For you know, wanting to eat the bread, you’re not a bad person because you want to eat the bread. That’s just what’s comfortable to you. It’s just what you’ve done. It’s what’s familiar to you.
Change what’s familiar to you. And you can change anything you want in your life. And honestly, you’re right now where you are today, you’re already good at doing everything you’re doing today. Okay, here, like whatever you’re doing today. You’re good at already. This is comfortable for you. Okay, all the habits that you have right now all the thought patterns, all the things you do automatically or that seem automatic for you. This is all familiar, it’s comfortable and safe. This is your comfort zone.
So when you want to change something, it’s going to feel uncomfortable to you. Are you willing to go through that? Are you willing to feel uncomfortable to change? You have to be willing to feel uncomfortable? It’s the only way you can change anything in your life. Are you willing to do the work to feel terrible for a little while until things start to feel more familiar, more habitual, more comfortable for you?
And you’re probably saying yes, Patrick, I am. And people tell me yes all the time. In advance, they tell me yes, before they feel uncomfortable. They’re like, of course, I’m willing to feel uncomfortable. But then when they actually do start to feel the discomfort, and they start to feel kind of terrible, then they’re like, Hell, no, I didn’t sign up for this. This is not what I thought you meant when you said I was going to be uncomfortable.
And I’m like, Yeah, that’s what it is. It doesn’t feel good. It feels terrible. And it’s okay. You can get through it. It’s temporary. It doesn’t last forever, you can get good, you just got to practice it. But it’s funny, because people are, are all in with the discomfort ahead of time. You know, they’re like, Yes, I’m willing to feel uncomfortable in a few weeks, no problem at all.
But then a few weeks go by, and they’re like, Oh, I really feel terrible. Get me off of this thing, you’re like, Nope, you got to just stay where you are. That’s the only way you got to get, you just got to get through it. So, but when you when you start to feel that discomfort, that’s when you start engaging in the self sabotaging behaviors, even though you don’t even know you’re doing it, you’re going to start to do things just to get back to the comfortable just to get back to the familiar. Even if it’s something that’s bad for you.
You know that, like let’s say you’re trying not to drink alcohol right now. And you know that, you know, drinking alcohol is bad for you, let’s say okay, and you just know that you want to take a break for those months, you know, and it’s gonna start to feel uncomfortable, and you’re gonna find yourself wanting to drink or maybe you find yourself drinking, even though you don’t want to do that.
Consciously you’re like, I don’t even want this right now. Subconsciously, your primitive brain is like, you got to get something good, you got to get something to make you feel more comfortable here. Alcohol is what we usually do. So let’s go back to doing that. Alright. Even though you know, it’s like, it’s not good for you. It’s not healthy. It’s not what you want for yourself in this moment, you’re going to do it anyway.
Listen, if you find yourself stuck, or find yourself not making progress toward a goal, you need to hear this, you’re not stuck because you’re incapable of change, you’re stuck because you don’t feel like doing what it takes to change. I’m going to say this again. Because I think this is really important.
You’re not stuck because you’re incapable of change. You’re stuck because you don’t feel like doing what it takes to change. You don’t feel like doing what it takes to change because what it takes to change is getting uncomfortable is seeking out the unfamiliar, seeking out the uncomfortable. And we get hung up on labels sometimes like we use these labels of like we have good feelings which equal comfort and safety and familiar familiarity and we have bad feelings like discomfort, danger unfamiliar. And I just want to say right now that I don’t think these are accurate labels, I don’t think any feeling is good or bad.
Being a human being means we get to experience all of our emotions, the quote unquote positive emotions, the quote unquote, negative emotions, we experience joy and sadness, happiness, and sorrow, peace and confusion, you know, anger and contentment, we get to experience all these things. And it’s cool, it’s cool, we can experience all these emotions, we’re not going to die from feeling our feelings, right.
But when you live your life from a place of always trying to avoid any of these negative feelings, you’re going to find yourself stuck in a loop of always trying to avoid feeling stuff, you’re going to always be seeking pleasure. You’re always going to be avoiding discomfort, avoiding anything unfamiliar. And you’re gonna find yourself stuck and frustrated, and never becoming more never changing anything.
Because you’re always trying to avoid feeling half your feelings, basically. All right. The way you stop the self sabotage is to get really good at feeling uncomfortable about embracing the discomfort. Get out into the unfamiliar territory, on purpose, do it on purpose. Do things that are hard, do things that don’t feel good, but that will move you in the direction of your goals and dreams. Do the hard stuff even though you don’t feel like it?
This is like the key to accomplishing anything is you make a plan and then you stick to the plan even when you don’t feel like it. Even if it feels you know unfamiliar even if it feels scary. Even if you don’t understand how it’s all going to work even though it feels uncomfortable. I’m doing this right now for myself.
I started, I found myself getting to this place where I kept hitting snooze in the morning a bunch of times, like I set my alarm for six o’clock, and I would hit snooze a bunch of times, right? And listen, as an entrepreneur, I get to make my own hours. Okay, so I’m like, Yeah, I make my own hours, I can get up whenever I want to, you know, and I just found myself wasting time.
So hitting snooze, you know. And I decided in pretty recently, a few weeks ago, that I was going to be the kind of person who got up at 5:30. And started working and just got to work right away. And so I’ve been doing that I’ve set my alarm for 5:30. I don’t hit snooze, I use my, you know, phone as like an alarm. And so I hit stop. And then the feet are on the ground. Every morning, 5:30, stop, feet hit the floor.
And this, I got to tell you guys, this feels terrible. It’s really hard. It’s very unfamiliar for me, for me, because I’ve been doing this snooze thing for like, a long time, you know. And it’s uncomfortable, it’s unfamiliar, I don’t like it, it feels terrible, I’m tired, I want to sleep more. I feel like I need more sleep, you know, when I wake up in the morning.
But I gotta tell you, every day that I do this, I feel better about myself, I’m building confidence in myself, because that hitting snooze over and over again was like a form of me self sabotage and wanting to stay in the familiar. And so I’m forcing myself to break that habit. And this is how you do it.
You just got to get out into the unfamiliar, decide what it is you want for yourself and do that thing, even though you don’t feel like it. When my alarm went off this morning at 5:30. I was deep in sleep, I was in the middle of some dream. And I was just like, so deeply asleep. And I open my eyes. And I hit stop and the feet are on the ground. And I got up. And literally within like two minutes, I’m wide awake, and it’s fine.
But it’s like, you just got to do the hard thing she got to do what, what you need to do, even though you don’t feel like it. I don’t feel like getting up at 5:30. But I’m doing it. I’m getting a lot done. And I feel so much better about myself and the self sabotage has stopped.
So here’s your homework for this week. I got a homework assignment for you. I want you to decide what it is you want for yourself. And then I want you to see what you are doing or not doing. Because you just want to stay with the familiar and the comfortable.
So what do you want to be doing? Or what do you want to stop doing? Because it’s too hard or unfamiliar or uncomfortable. So this could be you know, not drinking or sticking to your food plan or sticking to a running schedule? Or running faster or doing weight training, or doing speed work or whatever it is for you. What is it that you want to be doing? Or what do you want to stop doing? But you’re not because it’s unfamiliar, because it’s uncomfortable, because it’s hard because you don’t feel like it.
I want you to do that thing this week. Do it even though you don’t feel like it. So if you tell yourself, I don’t want to be eating sugar this week, then don’t eat the sugar this week. And there’s going to be times when you are going to feel like eating the sugar. Don’t do it.
Or you’re going to say you know, hey, I want to, you know, do speed work two times this week, and then you’re gonna wake up and you’re gonna put your running shoes on, you’re gonna be like, I really don’t feel like doing this right now. This I hate speed work. It’s so hard. I’m gonna feel terrible. Do it anyway, even though you don’t feel like it. This is how you stop the self sabotage. This is how you change anything that you want for yourself.
Okay, so that’s your work for this week. Cool. Let me know how that goes for you. I want to hear about it. You can post your homework assignment, you can post your results in our Facebook group. Cool. Alright, that’s all I got for you guys. I hope you got something out of this episode today. And if you did, I would love it if you would share this with a friend I love you all keep on Running Lean. Talk to you soon.
If you’re a runner and you’ve been struggling to lose weight or you keep losing and gaining the same 10 pounds over and over again. Or you’re finally ready to get to your natural weight and stay there for good this time then I have something you will love. I’ve created a powerful new training just for you called running lean for life. You’ll learn exactly how to transform yourself into a lean fat-burning running machine. So you can run without bonking, lose weight without calorie counting and develop the habits required to make it last for life. To get this free training right now go to runningleanpodcast.com/leanforlife and start your transformation today.
When it comes to habit change, there’s this idea that if you do something every day for a period of time - 30-60-90 days - then you will automatically develop a new habit. I cannot tell you how …
My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster, and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.
Hey there and welcome to Episode 78, of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray, the weight loss coach for runners. And today I’m talking about the problem with streaks. So when it comes to habit change, changing any kind of bad habit if you want to create new habits.
There’s this idea out there that if you just do something every day for a period of time, like 30 days, 60 days, 90 days, whatever it is, then you will automatically develop a new habit. And I just have to say that this is wrong. Okay, it just doesn’t work this way, there’s a lot more going on under the covers, there’s a lot more to habit to change than just like doing a certain behavior every single day.
How many times have you ever had a streak going like maybe you’ve given up sugar, or you’ve quit drinking for weeks or months straight, and then one day something happens, and just like that the streak is over. And then you’re right back to your old ways as if nothing has ever happened, right? This is very, very common, it happens all the time.
In order to create new habits, we have to make changes at a deeper level. Right? This very surface-level thing of just changing a behavior is not enough to make new habits and to create deeper, meaningful changes. Okay, so today here, I’m going to be talking about the problem with streaks.
And what you might want to focus on instead, if you really want to make lasting, meaningful changes in your habits. Okay, but first, if you like this podcast, you have to come check out the Running Lean podcast community on Facebook.
This is a group that goes hand in hand with the podcast, we extend the conversation over there in the group, we have a two-way conversation that gives you a voice gives you a place to ask questions and get feedback. And I’ve got a new challenge coming up. I haven’t done a challenge for a little while.
And I’ve been thinking a lot about this. And a lot of people have been coming to me talking about this subject. And so we’re going to be tackling this in July. And this is the challenge where I’m calling it dry July. Starting July 1, we’re going to give you an opportunity to take a break from alcohol, like maybe you just wanted like to see what it feels like to not drink for the month of July. And see if you feel better.
And I want to be very clear, this is not about like a streak is not about like putting in the number of days together or anything like that. This is about a group of people who all want to, you know, see if they feel healthier, and see if they feel better without drinking alcohol. Alcohol is not bad, I want to make sure you guys understand this. I’m not anti-alcohol.
But if you’re trying to lose weight, or if you’re trying to, you know, hit some sort of running goal or some sort of health goal, alcohol can be detrimental to weight loss, it can be detrimental to your running performance. And so we’re just going to talk about that. We’re going to talk about alcohol you know why you might want to limit or moderate your alcohol intake. And if you’ve ever tried to do this on your own, it’s been hard, come and join us and we’ll do it together.
Okay, we’re going to support each other, encourage each other, I’m going to do some kind of training in coaching in the Facebook group in the month of July. I’ll be talking about this subject here on the podcast too. So it’ll be a lot of fun.
This is not for people who are, you know, addicts or alcoholics like you need to seek some professional help with that kind of stuff. This is just for people who, you know, maybe want to like limit their drinking or just you know, maybe they drink a little too much and they want to like see what it would feel like to, to moderate or to quit for a little bit. Okay, so just go to Facebook, search for Running Lean community and come join us. It’s gonna be fun. I promise it’s gonna be fun.
And here’s another five-star review of the Running Lean podcast. This is from S4Waltz. And S4Waltz says, “Thanks for all you do. Hi, Patrick. I just finished listening to your interview with Leticia. I started listening and found your podcast during the pandemic and her story was amazing. I quit sugar after hearing your story and I guess, I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks. I actually started running in the late 1970s with my dad. I’m 63 now and hearing encouragement is needed no matter how long you’ve been running. The good thing about getting older is how many times I’m the only person in my age group. So I always place in my age group.”
That’s awesome. And then this person goes on to say, “Here’s a fun story, my first 10k, I wore cut-off blue jean shorts, because I didn’t know what people wore for running. Keep up the great work. And thanks for all you do.” Thank you S4Waltz, for that awesome five-star review.
And just so you know, I had this recurring nightmare where I show up at a marathon. And I’m, I have nothing on but jeans, I mean, I’m wearing like a shirt or whatever. But I don’t have running shorts, I’m wearing jeans that I have to, you know, toe the line at the start of a marathon wearing jeans. And so that’s kind of a nightmare of mine.
And listen, if you want to share the love, I would really appreciate it just go to wherever you listen to your podcast, scroll down to where it says leave a review, tap the stars and write a few words of a little love that you got for the podcast, I’d really appreciate that. I love hearing that you guys are getting something out of this.
And then hey, if you ever want a little bit of help losing weight, becoming a fat-adapted runner, or learning how to change habits, for good, for real, I got you covered. I work with runners every single day as a one-on-one coach, and a coach can do a lot of things for you, a coach can help encourage you to do things that you don’t want to do.
A coach can hold you accountable. A coach can help you navigate all the confusing information that’s out there about running nutrition, weight loss, all that stuff. And a coach can be your guide and your support and that expert to help keep you moving in the direction of your goals.
My goal as a coach is always to help you become the person that you want to become. So we talked about that, who is it that you want to become? How can I help you get there? And you know, I do a lot with helping people see how their mind works and helping people change bad habits and eliminate bad habits and create new healthy habits.
So that, you know, feeling good, being healthy can just become a part of who you are. And what you do, it just becomes the new you. So that’s the goal of coaching. And that’s kind of how it works. So if you want to learn more, or you want to apply for coaching, just go to runningleanpodcast.com/apply.
And then you and I will jump on a Zoom call and we’ll have a conversation, we’ll just see if it’s a good fit. It’s not for everybody. And that’s fine. But if you want to just see what it’s all about, it can’t hurt to have a conversation that doesn’t cost you anything except maybe about 30 minutes of your time. Cool. All right. All right.
So let’s get into this topic of streaks, okay, and the problem with streaks. So first of all, I want to make sure we’re all on the same page about what we’re talking about here. We’re not talking about the kind of streaks where you run naked in public to amuse or shock others, that is actually one definition of a streak. We’re not talking about running through the quad, streaking through the quad. You know that is not what we’re talking about here.
We’re talking about a continuous period of specified success. This is what the definition of a streak is the way we’re sort of framing it in this conversation today. Okay. And listen, I gotta say this upfront, and I’ll talk more about this later. But I’m not opposed to streaks, I don’t think they’re bad. Okay. But I think we have a misconception about what a streak is going to do for us. And that’s what I want to address today. Okay.
So if you’re a runner, and you’re on some sort of running streak, and you’ve been running every day for months, or years, or whatever it is, like more power to you keep doing that. I did that for a while I’ve done that several times. I’ve done a month-long streak, I think I did up to like 80 some days of running every day until I just forgot one day.
And then I woke up the next day. I’m like, well, that’s over. And I’ll talk a little bit about that too, and about how that makes us feel because sometimes that’s the problem with streaks. That’s one of the problems is that we beat ourselves up about it. Okay.
But the biggest problem I see. And the biggest problem I want to address is this: is that we think that a streak of doing something every single day is going to somehow automatically change you. Like if you have a bad habit, all you have to do is just, you know, not do it every single day and then eventually you’re cured. Or, you know, if you’re you know, somebody that you know, maybe he drinks too much, or maybe eats a lot of sugar. And you’re like, you know what, I just got to stop doing this for 30 days, and then I’ll be fixed, you know, you think that it will automatically change you.
And I have to say that this is just not true. It’s just not true. We’ve all done this before, we’ve gone on a diet for months sometimes, and then just gone right back to doing what we did before. There are people who, you know, they check themselves into rehab, because they, maybe they drink too much, maybe they, you know, have this problem with drinking or drugs or something like that.
And this is so common, they go into rehab for like, 30 days, and they just come out, and they just go right back to drinking, or people who go to prison, people get locked up in jail for years, and then they come out and they just start drinking again or doing the drugs or whatever it is that got them locked up in the first place.
And you would think just being away from this for a period of time would be enough, but it’s not. Because you’re not, you’re not addressing the underlying issue here, okay. You know, if somebody like stops eating sugar, like, let’s say, you stop eating sugar, and we’ve done this before, in that Facebook group, we’ve done like a no sugar challenge, okay?
If you stop eating sugar for a month, and then all of a sudden, one day, you know, oh, it was so and so’s birthday at work. And so they had cake, and I just ate a cake. You know, I had this bad day at the office, and I came home and I just had ice cream for dinner, you know, this happens all the time.
This is very, very common, just not eating sugar for 30 days doesn’t automatically mean like you’re cured, or you’re never going to go back to it again. Okay, we’re not addressing the underlying issues. And the real problem isn’t that you’re not doing enough of it, or you haven’t put the right number of days in a row together. Like that’s not what the problem is.
The real problem that’s not being addressed is you haven’t changed your thinking. You have to change your thinking if you want to change a habit. So I’ve talked about this before here on the podcast, and that is this idea that our thoughts cause our feelings and our feelings drive our actions. You know this is the think, feel, act cycle.
And when we understand that it’s not about what we’re doing, that’s causing us to think a certain way, it’s the other way around, the way we are thinking is driving our actions ultimately. And so if we want to change behavior, you know, create a new habit, a new healthier habit, something that’s going to last, we have to change how we’re thinking and feeling about it, in order to change the actions.
And the actions are important too. Like you have to you know, like, if you want to quit smoking, you have to not smoke, right? That’s part of the deal, right? You have to do that as well. But you have to focus on the thinking and feeling part, if you don’t focus on that, something’s going to happen. And you’re just going to pop right back into that old habit again. Okay.
So our thinking is really the key, and just changing some habit or doing something every day doesn’t change our thinking about it. Right? Otherwise, you know, this would be so much easier for us, right? Just don’t eat sugar for 30 days and you’re cured, you’ll never want it again, it’s not true.
Because if you’re in the habit of, you know, eating sugar all the time, because it makes you feel good. You know, it’s solving a problem for you, it’s solving an emotional issue that you’re having, it’s numbing you out to your emotions, so you don’t have to feel them.
I guarantee you can put, you know, six months straight together, and it’s not going to change how you think and feel about it. Because you haven’t addressed that part of it. Okay. So that’s like, my number one issue with streaks is that they don’t really address the cause of the habit in the first place.
Listen, our brains are malleable. Our brains are amazing and powerful. And we have all these habits that we’ve created over the years and decades of our lives. Like, you know, drinking is a good example. Just because, you know, every let’s say you drink every day, you’re this kind of person after work, you just come home, you have a glass of wine. It’s how you unwind, right?
It’s how you, you know, just relax, you know, but you’ve been creating this habit of every time I come home from work and I want to unwind, I want to like kind of numb out a little bit because maybe I’ve had a stressful day I’m feeling a little bit of stress or a little anxiety. Little anger or something like that inside, and I drink the wine. And it kind of numbs me to that.
And so you’ve just gotten this habit of, you know, feeling an emotion and then numbing it out with a little bit of alcohol. Right? Very common, it’s not a big deal, okay, but if that’s something you want to change, if that’s no longer working for you, and you want to change that, you’re going to come home from work, and you’re going to not have the alcohol but you’re going to feel terrible, you’re going to be like, I don’t, this doesn’t feel right.
Because you haven’t retrained your brain with a new, you know, thought feeling action pattern, the pattern, you’re, you’re interrupting the pattern by not, you know, rewarding that emotion that you’re feeling by not numbing to that emotion that you’re feeling.
But you haven’t changed the behavior at all. You’re just changing, you’re just like not giving your brain what it wants, you’re not, you’re not squashing down those emotions, okay? So we have to change things at a deeper level, okay. thinking, feeling, and acting, are the things we have control over in our lives.
And so these are the things that drive us. These are the things that create habits. Our brains, our habits are, are ingrained in our brain, they’re like, we have these neural pathways that are well developed and well-worn pathways. They’re very, you know, they’re like, fast like you, you think, feel and act so quickly, like, I’m just all of a sudden feeling a little stressed out, boom, the wine is already in my hand, and I’m drinking it. That’s how habits work.
Okay, so we have to change at a deeper level. But we can, like I said, our brains are malleable, we can actually change the pattern. And over time, you can change that thought, feeling action pattern, and create new neural pathways.
But it requires change at all three places, you cannot just change the action that you’re doing. You have to change the thoughts and the feelings as well. Okay, so that’s like the number one issue I have with any kind of like streak, okay, you’re not if you want to change a habit, you’re not addressing the real underlying causes of the habit and the underlying mental and emotional states that are driving the behavior. Alright.
Alright, the other issue I have with streaks is this: is that if you miss a day, you beat yourself up like crazy. So let’s say you put together a bunch of days in a row, let’s say you’re doing a running streak, and you run every single day for 60 days, or 90 days, or whatever it is. And then you miss a day. Oh, now you’re back to zero. You’re a failure.
You like you make it mean something really awful and negative like you’re a bad person. And all that hard work you’ve done, everything you’ve done is just wasted. It’s all gone. Now. I think this is a dumb way of looking at things, okay. When you beat yourself up, because you miss a day, I think you’re really missing the big picture.
All right, you’re just looking at a streak of a number of days. And you’re making it mean that like, you’re a good person if you continue with the streak. And if you end the streak, you’re a bad person. But I gotta tell you something, just about every single streak is going to come to an end at some point, right?
Just about every single streak that you engage in is probably going to come to an end at some point. Now I know people who have been on running streaks for 10 years, 15 years, they run every day and more power to you. That is amazing. That is really cool.
But if they were to stop that it doesn’t mean anything bad. It doesn’t mean that they have failed. It doesn’t mean they like their all that hard work is down the drain. But we think that’s what it means when we miss a day of a streak, you know, and I just have to make sure that we all understand that it doesn’t mean anything. Doesn’t mean anything.
It’s not anything negative unless you think it’s something negative. And that’s another problem I have with it is that we just think that it’s a bad thing if we end our streak, or if we don’t you know if we’re not successful if you say oh, you know, I’m going to stop eating sugar for 30 days and then halfway through. You eat half a doughnut or something like that.
Oh, all that hard work is down the drain. It’s not down the drain. You haven’t messed anything up really. Just go back to not eating sugar again. Boom, it’s easy. It doesn’t have to mean anything doesn’t have to be. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It doesn’t mean you are a failure.
It doesn’t mean you have faith. It doesn’t mean you’re not improving your health, it just means that you, you know, you had a little mini failure or a setback or whatever you want to call it, it’s not a big deal, though, we just pick ourselves back up and start over.
You know, that’s all. That’s the work. The work is we just carry on, no matter what, no matter how many times we fall off the wagon, or whatever you want to call it. There’s no wagon, right? So a streak misses the bigger picture here.
And the bigger picture is this. Why are you really doing this? Why are you running every day? Why do you want to stop eating sugar for 30 days or 90 days? Why are you, you know, lifting weights every day? Why are you not drinking? What is the goal? If the goal is to just put a certain number of days together in a row? And to check them off on your calendar like x x x?
Like if that’s your goal, how many is is the right number? How many is enough? If you get to 100 days does that? What does that mean? All right, have you changed anything really? I think when we just focus on a number of days, in a row of something, we’re missing the bigger picture, we’re missing the big lie. Why are you doing this?
You know, I talked about this before, like I made this like, promise to myself last month, I was going to do yoga for a month for 30 days straight. And I got to about day 27. And I just couldn’t do it. Like I just had, I was traveling, I just didn’t have the time and I came to about 10 o’clock at night and I was like I made a decision I could either do it and it would have been weird, I was ready to go to bed.
Or I could just like skip it and make it not mean anything. And that’s what I chose, I made the decision to just skip it. And I was fine with that I felt good about that effect. It felt liberating. I felt like you know what? This, what a relief. Because sometimes we get into streaks of doing things every single day, and it becomes stressful for us. Is that how you want to go through your life, like stressed out about, I can’t miss a day of running, or I can’t miss a day of doing yoga, or I can’t miss a day of not eating sugar, whatever it is?
No, that’s not the point of life. You can’t go through your life that way. That’s no way to become the healthiest, most badass version of yourself to be stressed out about it every single day.
Listen, when I’m working with people, and we’re working on changing diets, and you know, changing their exercise and creating new habits and things like that we focus on the fun, we focus on making it enjoyable.
Because if you don’t, if this is a stressful nightmare for you, I guarantee you, you are going to fail, you’re going to quit, who wants to do that? I don’t want to do that I want to live my life that way. So what’s the bigger picture? Why are you really doing this? Why are you engaged in this, you know, a streak of whatever it is running every day? Or you know, not drinking every day? Why? Why do you want to do that? Why is that important to you?
Some examples that I hear from people are, you know, I want to be around for my kids. You know, I feel so good. When I’m not eating sugar, I feel so good when I’m not drinking. I want more of that in my life. I want to be able to play with my grandkids. And the way I’m going you know I’m you know my doctor says I need to get my blood sugars under control or whatever.
Like I want to lose weight, I want to be a strong and lean runner, I want to you know, I want to look good naked. I want to be a good example. I want to set a good example for my kids. And when you look at it this way, when you think about the bigger picture, the number of days in a row becomes irrelevant.
Doesn’t matter how many days in a row, you did something who cares? Do you want to just say it on your gravestone, you know? Well, you know, they ran 864 days in a row, but then they were a failure. No, you just want it to be like, you know, this is a badass person.
They were awesome. They were healthy. They were around for their kids. They were a good example for others. They inspired other people to be more they became the best version of themselves. That’s what I want. I don’t think you can fit all that on a gravestone. But I’m just saying that’s the way I want to be remembered.
So I think, you know the counting numbers of days in a row of something just kind of misses the bigger picture right. Now, here’s I’m going to kind of contradict myself a little bit here because I haven’t had a drink of alcohol for over 14 years. And I’m not going to end that streak anytime soon that I know of.
Alright, I’m not like purposely going to set out to like in that streak of not drinking. But my goal with this is not to put a number of days in a row together. That’s not the goal. I’m not just checking days off a calendar. My goal with not drinking is that I feel better when I don’t drink and I don’t have a desire to numb myself to my thoughts and feelings anymore.
And I want to live life and experience my emotions without numbing out to them. And so that’s why I don’t drink alcohol. And you know what, it’s fine, you know, I don’t have a desire for it anymore. And it’s fine for me to just like, I don’t want it.
And here’s where I’m kind of contradicting myself, because I have this app on my phone, and you can plug in like the date you stopped drinking, and it gives me some information. It says you’ve been sober. You’ve been sober for 14.2 years, 170.5 months, 5190 days, 124,548 hours, okay. And I look at that every now and then I just go hmm, all right, cool, whatever.
But what if, hypothetically, what if I had a drink? What if I had a sip of alcohol? And I had to put all those numbers back to zero? Does that mean that everything I’ve done and learned and accomplished in the last 14 years has been wasted? Does that mean that it was all for nothing? Does that, you know, diminish everything that I’ve done? Have I thrown it all away? Is everything down the drain? No, doesn’t mean any of that stuff doesn’t mean I’m a failure. I failed. No.
And I hear people talk about this sometimes in, you know, some of the sobriety sober circles that I’m in some of the, you know, networks that I’m in, and they talk about oh, so and so sober for like 20 years, and then they went out and drank. They just threw it all away. Really did they throw it all away? I don’t look at it that way. I don’t look at it that way at all.
I think you learn so much when you can change your habits. And when you can, like change your thinking and change your feeling and your actions and change that whole cycle and like really become aware and curious about how your brain works. And like you, I think you just learned so much and you grow so much in that process that it doesn’t matter how many days in a row, you do something, it really, really doesn’t.
You know, the real goal is to create healthy new habits that help you to become who you want to become that help you to become more. The real goal is to change how your mind works at its core to change your, your, your state, you know, to change your internal state so you can change your external reality to change your external world. The real goal is to reprogram your mind with new thought, feeling, and action patterns.
You know, and the way you do this is through awareness and curiosity. Just notice how you think and how you’re feeling. When you’re about to take an action. You know, when you’re about to do something when you’re about to grab for the drink, when you’re about to go for the sugar when you’re about to go off your plan or like not go run because you just don’t feel like it like what is your brain telling you in that moment? What’s important to you?
Be curious, be aware of how your brain is working. Now, I’m not saying streaks are bad, streaks are not bad. There are some benefits to streaks. And there are some reasons why you might want to do things every day in a row. Like it’s kind of motivating for some people.
Okay, so let’s say you’ve been running every day, and you know, there’s a day where you just don’t feel like it. Or maybe you have been like staying off of sugar. And then there’s a day where like, you’re all of a sudden you’re like I just want to eat some ice cream right now.
But you’ve said to yourself, well, you know, I’ve put a bunch of days together in a row. So I don’t want to break that streak like that can be kind of motivating for people. But I’m just telling you don’t rely on this one thing to change your habit because that’s not going to work.
Inevitably you will break the streak. Something will always happen. You’re going to break the streak and then what? You’re going to beat yourself up you’re right back to where you were before because you haven’t actually changed your thinking and feeling about it. Okay, but it can be a little bit motivating for some people, right.
Another thing I think is cool about streaks is that they can be kind of fun, like doing a 30-day challenge. Friends, like we’re gonna do in our Facebook group is kind of fun and can help you to maybe help you to do things that you might not normally do on your own. Right.
So you’ve got the support of people around you, you’re having fun doing something together. But just know that it’s not a magic pill, that’s going to automatically mean you have like, all these new habits, and you’re a changed person. But it can be fun. And it can help you to, you know, start to learn about yourself.
When you combine a streak with understanding how your thoughts and feelings work, that’s powerful, right, but just doing a thing every day and checking it off the calendar is not enough, really. Because listen, you can lock yourself away in a cabin in the middle of the woods, and try to get away from alcohol or try to, you know, distance yourself from ice cream, or whatever it is.
And then one day, somebody’s gonna come along with a bottle, or an ice cream cone and just be like, Hey, would you like to indulge in this and you’re just gonna screw it all up for you. Like, you just can’t get away from it right? And we have to understand how our brain works.
We have to change the way our thoughts and feelings and actions, that whole cycle, that whole pattern works in order to make these lasting and meaningful changes in our lives. Okay. Again, think about your why, why are you doing this? Why do you want to give up drinking? Why do you want to, you know, stop eating sugar so you can lose weight? Like, why is that important to you?
When we think about this, it starts to really tap into some deeper things that we can address and work through. Okay. All right, you guys, I hope you join us over in the Facebook group in July for our dry July challenge. I think it’s gonna be a lot of fun. We’re gonna have some fun just talking about, you know, maybe taking a break from alcohol for a little while.
And I hope you got something out of this particular episode today. If you did, please consider sharing it with a friend. I would love that. And as always love all of you keep on Running Lean. I’ll talk to you soon.
If you’re a runner and you’ve been struggling to lose weight or you keep losing and gaining the same 10 pounds over and over again. Or you’re finally ready to get to your natural weight and stay there for good this time then I have something you will love. I’ve created a powerful new training just for you called running lean for life. You’ll learn exactly how to transform yourself into a lean fat-burning running machine. So you can run without bonking, lose weight without calorie counting and develop the habits required to make it last for life. To get this free training right now go to runningleanpodcast.com/leanforlife and start your transformation today.
I have a very special guest joining me here on the podcast today. A few months ago, Latisha Simmons was facing some pretty serious health issues and decided she needed to make some big changes in …
Continue Reading about 75. How Being Healthy Becomes a Lifestyle with Latisha Simmons →
Patrick McGilvray
My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster, and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.
Hey there, and welcome to episode 75 of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray, the weight loss coach for runners. And today, I’ve got a very special episode for you. I’ve got a special guest joining me here on the podcast today. Latisha Simmons.
So a few months ago, Latisha was facing some pretty serious health issues. And she decided that she needed to make some big changes in her life. So she changed her entire approach to diet to running to strength training. And most importantly, though, she changed her mindset around all of this.
And she’s worked really hard on making this whole idea of becoming healthy and being healthy. She’s worked hard on making this her new lifestyle. Like I said, she’s come a long way in just a few months. And I thought it’d be beneficial for all of us to hear her story of transformation. So that’s coming right up.
We had this conversation, Latisha and I, recently in the Running Lean Facebook group. And if you haven’t checked it out yet, please come check out the Running Lean podcast community on Facebook, I created this group so that you and I could have a conversation, that it was a place where you can ask questions and get answers and do it all in a way that’s like fun and encouraging and motivating. So just go on Facebook and search for Running Lean community and come join us. Come join in on the fun.
And then quickly, here’s another five star review of the Running Lean podcast. This one’s from Tammy. Tammy says, “I love everything you teach. I listened to your podcast when I run. And when I work out. Thank you for everything. I’m in love with my new lifestyle. I love to listen to your new podcasts and the old ones too. Thank you again, Tammy.”
Tammy, thank you so much for leaving this nice review, I really appreciate it. And if you enjoy the podcast, I would love it if you could tap the stars just leave a quick rating and review. It just helps other people to find the show. So you can do that on Apple podcasts and probably other places where you listen to podcasts.
And then hey, if you ever want a little help losing weight, or, or making all of this a lifestyle, I’ve got you covered. As a one on one coach, I work with runners every day who are working to become the healthiest and most badass versions of themselves.
So a coach doesn’t just show you what to do. A coach will hold you accountable. Coach will help you get through all of the challenging stuff. And there will be challenging stuff, I promise you. A good coach will encourage you to do the stuff you don’t want to do so that you can become the person you want to become. So not everyone needs coaching.
But for those who who want the expert guidance, who want the support, the encouragement, the accountability, then coaching might be perfect for you to learn more and apply. Just go torunningleanpodcast.com/apply.
And what happens is you’ll schedule a call with me and you and I’ll jump on a quick zoom call, we’ll have a short conversation. And we’ll see if coaching is a good fit for you. It might be it may not be either way. It’s cool. You have nothing to lose from just having a quick conversation. Okay, cool. So let’s get into this.
So like I said in the intro Latisha has come a long way in just a few months. She feels amazing. She’s lost a bunch of weight running is amazing for her. And she’s developed this awesome new mindset about what it really means to be healthy, how she’s sort of made this into a lifestyle.
Because listen, she’s tried other things before and they just never worked for her long term. But now she says things are different. She’s developed this new mindset about what it means to be healthy. And she’s just kind of made this how she lives her life. Now, this is just who she is and what she does. It’s really cool.
And no, it wasn’t a walk in the park for her. It was challenging. And she talks about this, she talks about especially at the beginning, it was very challenging for her but she had this determination that she was going to make it work and she was able to get through all of it. So I hope you enjoy this conversation that I had recently with Latisha Simmons. So let’s just get into this conversation if that’s cool with you, first of all, welcome, Latisha.
Latisha Simmons
Hi, Patrick. Thank you for having me.
Patrick McGilvray
This is my first time doing an interview in the group here like this. So…
Latisha Simmons
Guinea pig is what you tell me.
Patrick McGilvray
So you’re my guinea pig. Thank you for playing along with me, you are pretty awesome for doing that. I appreciate that you’re brave, you’re courageous. So just like introduce yourself and like, tell us like, where you tell us where you live. And like, tell us a little bit about your you know where you were a few months back and why you decided to make some changes and stuff. So just kind of give us a little bit of background and tell us like where you were coming from.
Latisha Simmons
Okay, so I live in Chattanooga, Tennessee, which is a small town in Tennessee, couple hours from Nashville, and a couple hours from Atlanta, Georgia born and raised here. So when I first came to purchase a little bit of backstory, I started running back in 2015, just to lose some weight, and I’ve been a yo-yo dieter all my life building weight issues.
So I started in 2015, to lose some weight. The way I lost at that time was by running and doing some strength training in basically counting calories. So I was successful with that 10 months after that I had lost 80 pounds, kept it off for a couple of years.
But then 2019 it started to creep back. And I just started regaining some of the weight. So Patrick talks to us about that all the time. So because I started gaining the weight back, of course, I wasn’t happy about that. Honestly, I was ashamed of gaining it back again.
So as a result, I just, I was still running the whole time. But my you know what, my eating wasn’t good. So I didn’t even like want to go like to my doctor’s appointments, like my annual doctor’s appointments, because I knew my doctors were gonna be like blessing.
So anyway, I didn’t go to the doctor for a year or two. And so finally, I went to the doctor earlier this year. And it actually was my gynecologist who was running, you know, some tests and she was like, I think you might be insulin resistant. Of course, I had really no idea what that was.
But because I have a family history of diabetes, is what made her even look at that for me. And she knows I had gained a significant amount of weight in a short period of time. So she ran tests, and sure enough, I was insulin resistant.
So that’s basically where I was when I found Patrick, I was insulin resistant, I had high blood pressure, because I had regained you know, so much of the weight back that I had lost. And because of the genetic predispositions has started to show up, I’m in my mid 40s. And apparently, that’s when all that starts to show up. So anyway, that’s where I was when I found you, Patrick.
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah, and then, you know, talk a little bit more about that feeling of like gaining the weight back. And you mentioned like that feeling of just feeling like ashamed of like, you know, you you did something, you know, that was good for you, and you did something good for yourself, and you made a big positive change in your life and your health. And then you slipped, you know, when you went back to a, you know, gaining a bunch of the weight back, like talk a little bit about how that felt.
Latisha Simmons
Yeah, I mean, I really, I mean, honestly, I felt like a failure, like I failed myself again. So it wasn’t a good feeling at all, I really didn’t understand what was happening because like I said, I was still running the whole time. I was still strength training the whole time. And you know that you hear, you know, if you’re a runner, you can eat whatever you want. So and I know that’s not true, but kinda sorta I was still doing that. And it’s worth a try. Right?
Exactly. Well, I’m here to tell you that doesn’t, you know, doesn’t matter how much you run if you don’t have your diet under control. It’s just not going to work. So yeah, I wasn’t in a good place. I didn’t feel good. Didn’t have the energy I used to have.
My running was hard to think about, you know, the more weight you’re carrying around, of course, it’s just uncomfortable. So yeah, I wasn’t in a good place wasn’t feeling good at all. And like I said, I just, I was feeling just really down on myself for you again, you know, losing the way but only to regain it again. So yeah.
Patrick McGilvray
And so you went to the doctor and the doctor said you’re insulin resistant. And what that means is that your body will no longer respond to the effects of insulin so your body just starts producing more and more insulin.
And when that happens, so insulin is that hormone that that locks up your fat in your in your fat cells and it doesn’t allow you to burn the fat so you’re always storing fat when insulin is high. So that’s kind of what was happening in with you. And, and so your doctor recommended something for you, what did she recommend that you do?
Latisha Simmons
Yes, she, when I left her office that day, I left with a low carb diet, low carb, low sugar diet. And basically, it was a list of foods that I could eat and a list of foods that I couldn’t eat. So she was like this is what you have to do.
The good thing about it is, so basically, insulin resistance is pretty much pre diabetes. Which means, you know, if you catch it early, you you know, if you change your lifestyle, your eating habits and workout and all that stuff, you can, you know, pretty much reverse it. So that’s the good thing.
She was like, you know, we caught it early. If you do what I tell you, you can you can beat this. So of course, I’m like, okay, just tell me what I need to do. So yeah, she gave me that, that told me you know what I needed to do. Um, but you know, I left there with two prescriptions that I didn’t have, when I when I walked in the door.
I’ve never been on any medication, you know, regularly like that in my life, knock on wood, but I am now. So that was really my motivation to really like, basically get my life together. Because she’s like, if you don’t, you’re gonna be on this medication the rest of your life. But if you do what I tell you, you know, you can come off of it within a couple of months.
So that’s what she told me. And around that same time, I feel like it was meant to be because I somehow found the Running Lean community on Facebook, which you and I were talking before, I don’t know how it took me so long to find it. But timing is everything.
So anyway, I found I found the Running Lean community. And it was right around the time you were doing the February challenge. We were starting on February 1. So all of that aligned with my doctor telling me to do this same diet that you were challenging us to do. So worked out perfectly. So I’ve been doing it every since February 1.
Patrick McGilvray
Awesome. We’ll just call that divine intervention. Yes, I like that. The gods were smiling upon all of us. Okay, so she sends you home with like this list of foods to eat, and you start doing the low carb thing. And then, okay, so what was your diet like before that, like what was it that was? What was the diet like that kind of got you to putting on all that weight again?
Latisha Simmons
So it pretty much was a free for all, like, I was just eating, you know, whatever I wanted to eat as much as I wanted to eat course, you know, all the meat, the three meals, the snacking in between. So that’s pretty much what my diet was.
I mean, I was eating, I’m a huge sweet eater. So of course, I was eating, you know, cakes, and cookies and doughnuts, and just all the stuff that I like to eat. Just really not even being mindful of what I was eating, just eating and that started happening.
It’s happening like right around 2019 ish, then of course, when the pandemic hit, I mean, you know, just, you know, that didn’t help the situation either. So just a lot of sugar, a lot of carbs, and just basically, anything I wanted to eat whenever I wanted to eat. So it was basically eating all the time. It felt like even as I was eating, I’ll be thinking about what am I gonna eat next meal. That’s, that’s kind of the state I was in.
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah, so you mentioned sort of, like just eating on was almost like unconscious eating. That’d be a way of describing it. Yeah, just eating. Yes. Like you don’t even know you’re like, how did I just eat that whole bag of chips?
Latisha Simmons
Exactly. Exactly. I was only supposed to eat three cookies. And now the whole bag is gone. Yeah.
Patrick McGilvray
Hmm. Once you start once you start you can’t stop though, right? I know. What about alcohol? Did you drink alcohol before?
Latisha Simmons
I did. So so like I said, I didn’t realize that I guess I was addicted to sugar because it will start in the morning with my coffee creamer. And in at night with a glass of desert wine, and of course, sugar and carbs in between the day too.
So I was drinking like a glass of wine every night, you know, in sweet wine so you know full of sugar. So that’s where I was before I started the low carb, low sugar.
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah, so you were drinking dessert wine. You were drinking dessert coffee in the morning, basically right? And like dessert breakfast and lunch dessert snacks. Isn’t it funny like everything? Like you know will say like, well you can’t eat cake for breakfast but have this pile of pancakes with maple syrup all over it and that’s fine.
Latisha Simmons
That was a regular breakfast for me that I love pancakes and syrup. Yes. And cranberry juice. Of course we know that juices are full of sugar. Just yeah, just sugar all throughout the day in different formats. And of course, we know sugars and so many things that we don’t even realize have sugar in it. And everything more. So yeah, that was my life. Yes.
Patrick McGilvray
Okay. Okay, so what were some of the big changes that you made? Like what was what kind of stands out to you? Now? Obviously, you stopped eating sugar. But what were some of the things that you did that were? Well, let’s let me put it this way. What were the hardest changes for you to make?
Latisha Simmons
How long we got? No. I know the answer. But I was just, I mean, man, there were a lot of things that it was hard, but I think I mean, it was hard to stop drinking wine every night. You know, that was hard to do.
You know, my little coffee creamer. That was hard to do. I mean, just think I mean, everything I was eating, and drinking has some kind of sugar in it. So I mean, it was just hard not to eat. You know, every time I looked around, you know, it’s just, there was a lot of things that was hard about my running was hard.
Once I you know, started not eating so much sugar, and carbs and all of that stuff. So I don’t know, honestly, patching back and saving. One thing was hard. I do know. Most everything was hard.
Everything, just everything about it was hard. Everything about it was hard. It was not easy at all. It was just hard to stop eating, you know, all the carbs all the sugar eating all the time. I mean, it was it was hard. It really was, yeah.
Patrick McGilvray
But you’re able to stick with it. You did a really good job of sticking with it, like you made a decision early on, that this is you know, I’m going to make this work. Because I’m not going on this medication for the rest of my life. And like, I’m not going to become a diabetic. And you made a work and you stuck to it. Like you were really, really good about sticking to it. Talk a little bit about that, like, what was that like for you?
Latisha Simmons
Well, I mean, like most runners, we’re pretty competitive people in you know, with ourselves. So one way to get me to do something is to tell me, I can’t do it, or expect me not to do it. Because my doctor didn’t tell me, you know, I couldn’t do it. She knows me. So she knows, she knew that if she told me if you don’t do this, this is gonna happen.
And you know, this is what we need to tell she knows me. So she knew that. So that’s basically what it is. It’s like, no, I’m not gonna be on this medication forever. I’m not gonna end up a full blown diabetic. No, so let’s do what we need to do. So, yeah, I was all in. I mean, one.
And like you said, I do feel like it was divine intervention, because it all kind of happened at the same time. So I was like, Okay, it’s meant for me to get my diet together and make this really a lifestyle change this time, stick with it, and you know, get take back control of my health is what I need to do.
So, I mean, that’s, that’s pretty much the mindset that I’ve had, I mean, you talk to us and several other podcasts about how important mindset is, and honestly, that’s it is, it’s all about your mindset. And so once I, you know, made up my mind that this is what we’re gonna do, like you said, I was all in.
And, of course, you know, having you there for support and accountability, and just, you know, walk me through every step of the way, is really a big part of why I’ve been so successful. So I mean, yes, I had to do the work, but I couldn’t have done it without all the support and accountability that I’ve gotten from working with you.
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah, and you know, what that whole mindset of like, going all in is really the key, it really is. Because I can be like, the motivator over here and your cheerleader, and I can show you what to do and encourage you and, you know, support you and hold you accountable. I can do all that stuff.
But at the end of the day, you’ve got to like do the work yourself, you’ve got to stick to your plan, you’ve got to, you know, show up and do your runs, even though it sucks. We’ll talk about that in a second. But like, you have to have the attitude of like, I’m going to do this for me, because I’m worth it.
And it’s important to me, you know, and my health is the most important thing that I have, you know, and so you made that commitment. And so I want to say, you know, I’m proud of you for for sticking with it, but mostly I’m impressed, because you made that commitment early on, and you just you nailed it. You know what I mean?
Like you just were like, I’m not going off my plan. And you you really stuck with it like like crazy, which is awesome. And here’s the thing, and you kind of mentioned this at the beginning like runners are good about stuff like that, like we’re competitive. And we can stick to a training program, no problem, you know, marathon training in the snow, you know, no problem I’ll show for that.
But then it’s like, don’t eat waffles. And you’re like, why isn’t oh my god crazy talk, you know. And so that’s I’m glad you brought that up. Because runners already have that mentality of like being able to stick with stuff and do the hard things, you know, we can absolutely do that, we just need to take that same attitude we have about sticking to our training plan and apply it over here to our to our diet and our nutrition and stuff like that.
So let’s talk a little bit about running because I know you struggled for a while. So there’s this thing that happens with runners and I’ve talked about this a million times. But it’s this fat adaptation period where when you as a runner decide to stop eating a lot of sugar and a lot of carbs, then it takes a while for your body to switch over from burning all that sugar and carbs to burning fat.
And burning fat is where you want to be because that’s where you lose weight. And that makes running so much easier. And stuff. I’ve talked about this so many times. But it’s hard to do, because there’s that period where you where you’re running, and you don’t have the energy here because you haven’t made the switch yet.
And so that that fat adaptation period can take on average, most people two to six weeks. I talk about this all the time. Some people it’s like a week or two, and it’s like, boom, no big deal. It took me like eight weeks, it took me a long time. What did that feel like for you? Like, what was that transition period? Like for you?
Latisha Simmons
Oh, my goodness, oh, man, it was really bad. The first couple of weeks, I don’t, I couldn’t run more than two, maybe three miles at a time. That’s as far as I could go. And so you can imagine, you know, you used to, you know, run in, you know, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14 miles, you know, depending on where you are in your training cycle. And you can’t even run two miles? You know, so it was hard.
And I think that was really one of the there was one of the times where you really came in handy for me because you were literally my cheerleader every week when I would meet with you because I’m like, they suck. And I don’t want to do it.
And you were like, you have to keep doing it. You know, so you really helped me through that period, because I really wanted to quit. I mean, that was the end now that you say what was the hardest part, there probably was the hardest part. Because I run really, I mean, it’s mainly mental health, I run for the mental benefits of running.
Sure, physically, it helps us to, but it really helps me mentally. So as much as I, I like how I feel when I run it wasn’t feeling good at all. And that went on for several weeks. And, and I think Patrick, I’m like you I think it took me probably six, seven weeks before my run started feeling good. So yeah, that was a long time.
But you know, I trusted you. And I really think too, that you have in your own personal journey, you know, your own struggles with you know, your lifestyle before you major change. I think, you know, knowing that this work for you, and you have no personal experience with this really helped me to trust you.
Even when you know you were saying, just keep going just keep going, I promise you on the other side is gonna be better. Knowing that you personally had that experience is what kept me going. I mean, cause I’m just gonna be honest, if it was somebody else that you know, is selling this whole thing and don’t have a personal experience with it. I probably wouldn’t have done and it would have just given up.
But knowing that you had had gone through the same thing. I was like, Okay, I’m trusting him. And I’m glad I did. Because now I mean, when I run, I look forward to running. I mean, I have rekindled my love for running again. When it’s you know, thanks to you telling me just don’t give up. Just keep going. It’ll get better to get better. I’m like, Okay, I’m trusting you, Patrick. So anyway, you know, it worked at it every week.
Patrick McGilvray
I was like, it’s just got to be getting better and you’re like no it took a while but but here’s the thing it’s like yeah, so you’re right that this is the the part where most people will just quit on this process because it does kind of suck and it’s hard.
And it just feels like you don’t have energy when you’re running and it’s not it’s not comfortable at all right? And so I just kept saying like you’re going to get through it I promise you it will happen it just takes what it takes for any everybody’s a little bit different. So and you did you eventually got to that point. So let’s think about a little bit now what is it like for you now running Like how is running for you today?
Latisha Simmons
Man running now it I mean, I am back to looking forward to it on my run days because I run four days a week and bike two days a week. So I run days I’m like, Oh yes, I get to run today it feels good. I have more energy to do it.
Even like on my speed days and my heal repeat days. I mean, I’m just killing those now. My recovery is better. Like, I feel like I recover quicker. There are times where I will go and do a 12 mile run on a Saturday. And that’s pretty much all I’m doing. I’m coming home, I’m eating, taking a shower, and I’m laying around all day.
Now I come home, eat, shower, and I go out and you know, enjoy my weekend because I just feel better. Even after the run, I feel like my recovery is better. So my running is I’m really enjoying it now. Because I look forward to my long runs even though it’s getting hot here in the south. Still just looking forward to my runs.
And honestly, and I never believed you when you would say this, but you like it’s come to feel amazing. And you’re gonna feel like you can just run all day. And yeah, I have to give it to you. That’s true.
There there are times where I’m like, oh, man, you know, if I’m only scheduled to do 8 or 10 I’m like, oh, I could have kept running. I mean, cause it felt that good today. So yeah, my running definitely is much better than it was when I first started the you know, the low carb low sugar. But yeah, I definitely have rekindled my love for running now. And it just feels great. And I look forward to doing it on my running days.
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah. And runnings probably also a little bit easier for you, Latisha because you’ve lost some weight. Well, yeah, I mean, would you say that’s true?
Latisha Simmons
Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.
Patrick McGilvray
So how much have you lost so far? Just in the last three months or so?
Latisha Simmons
I’m 32 pounds down. So yeah. 32 pounds since? Yeah, since I started.
Patrick McGilvray
Awesome work. Yeah, that’s a lot in a short amount of time. It is.
Latisha Simmons
And the good thing about it is, you know, once you get over, you know, I’d say the first probably two weeks. You don’t feel you know, deprived. You don’t you’re not hungry all the time, you’re not always thinking about what you need to eat next, you know, like, all those sugar cravings are gone.
So it’s just been just a whole 360 for me, like I and every week, of course, you know, this passion happy. Like, I can’t believe I’m not like thinking about food all the time. I’m not hungry all the time. Because I just couldn’t believe it because that, you know, that had been my life for so many years.
So yeah, that’s just been amazing not to, not to feel like a slave to food basically. This I felt before, like, you know, I was always thinking about him, it was just consuming, you know, my thoughts and my behavior and to not have that now.
I mean, there are times where, you know, it’s two, three o’clock in the afternoon. I’m like, oh, I need to eat. Like, I haven’t even had anything to eat, but I still have energy. I’m not crashing. And I’m not thinking about food all the time. So, man, it’s, it’s been a life changer. For me, it really has been.
Patrick McGilvray
That’s crazy right there. And that’s one of the things that I love about eating this way is that I’m not hungry all the time. Like, I didn’t eat until after 1:00 to 1:30. And I was just like, what what is this, you know? But there’s like this incredible amount of freedom in that because you’re not like, like you just said you’re not like obsessing about food 24 hours a day anymore.
You know, and when that goes away, you can start doing other things, you know, like, get on with your life, go for a run or whatever. And, and running, you know, drop, take 32 pounds and put it in a backpack and strap it to you and go run with that. And you know, runnings gonna be a lot easier without that 32 pounds on you for sure.
So what do you think about like, your ability to take this low carb sort of like lifestyle and like, go forward with it into the future? Is this something you feel like you can do forever? Is this something because you’ve tried other diets that didn’t work for you and you’ve tried to do other things? But do you feel like what you’ve learned here is something that you can perpetuate and that you can do pretty easily or does it seem like it’ll still be hard?
Latisha Simmons
Well, I mean, honestly, when when I walked out of my doctor’s office with this diet, I was like, there’s no way am I gonna be able to do this, first of all. Secondly, definitely not long term like, this is gonna be awful. Because you know, of course, we’ve all tried, like you said, the other low carb diets and stuff in the past.
But this, and again, you told me this, but I didn’t believe it. I mean, it definitely is easy. It’s a lifestyle. And I think that it’s not hard to do. Like, I still go to all my favorite restaurants. And there’s always something I can eat, that I can enjoy eating. So it’s not hard to do, like, it’s easy to fit into your lifestyle.
And, and that is what sets it apart from all the other diets I’ve ever done. The other ones were not sustainable. They just were not not long term. But this one to answer your question, I really do feel like I can do this for the rest of my life. And sure I have, you know, this threat of, you know, these health issues over my head, if I do go back to eating, you know, different types of diet.
But we all know, I mean, sometimes that’s not enough for people. But I do feel like for me, it’s I feel like I’m literally in a race against diabetes. I feel like that. And so it’s like, if you go back this way, then that’s what you’re looking at. But if you keep going this way, you know, you’ll be fine.
And you’ll be able to live a healthier life. And so, you know, I really don’t have a choice. I mean, I do, I mean, I could make that choice and end up on this, you know, medication, and you know, all of that, but I’m choosing not to do that. And I think this this low carb lifestyle definitely is the key to me being successful.
And I yeah, I don’t I really, I guess I still can’t believe that I don’t feel deprived. I mean, I keep waiting for that, you know, all the time like it. I mean, the fact that I don’t really I can’t eat pasta. I mean, I can I mean because of course you tell us, if there’s something you feel like you just really need to eat, eat it, then your very next meal, go back to your diet.
But I haven’t even had to do that like because I just don’t miss it. It’s like a life’s like this is what we’re doing. And so I’m just automatically, you know, making my choices based on my lifestyle. So I can’t believe it.
I never thought that I will find something that actually works for me. It’s good for my health in this sustainable. I just never thought that I will find that. But I really have and I just I can’t tell you how ecstatic I am about that.
Patrick McGilvray
So, so awesome. How about that dessert wine? Do you miss that?
Latisha Simmons
You know, I like to say after about two weeks. I didn’t because I don’t crave sugar like that anymore? Ah, interesting. No, I don’t crave sugar like that. And I’m just like, I mean, because I’ve been thinking I’m like, maybe I could just have a glass of wine. I’m like, I really don’t want because the the thought of how sweet is gonna be.
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah, you were concerned about that at the beginning. You’re like, I don’t know about giving up this dessert wine. I mean, because this is part of like who I am, you know? And you were not too thrilled about that part.
Latisha Simmons
Yeah. But when I think about, you know, just the consequences of it. It’s just not worth it. I mean, you know, will I drink alcohol again, I’m sure I will. But I don’t think that I’m going to be drinking a glass of wine every night. And it definitely won’t even be dessert wine. It’s going to be you know, something with less sugar than that. Like I said, not every night. So I really yeah, I’m surprised that I’ve been able to just just keep doing it.
Patrick McGilvray
So you were drinking a glass of wine every night and you haven’t you haven’t had any alcohol?
Latisha Simmons
I have had one drink. Not a dessert one.
Patrick McGilvray
One drink in three months versus every night. That’s a big change.
Latisha Simmons
Oh yeah, I’m not going to be. And I wanted to do that just to see what would happen. Yeah. And I you know, to be honest, I was scared to do it. Because it was like, a trigger or something? But you know, and it wasn’t as a really sweet drink either.
So I definitely know that’s not going to be the case. But yeah, I didn’t. I was like, okay, one drink of coke. And now I’ve been fine. So yeah, it’s not something that I just have to have anymore. But you’re right. I was concerned about it in the beginning.
Patrick McGilvray
Awesome. Yeah. So any final thoughts? Anything that you want to share that we haven’t talked about yet? Or, you know, what do you see yourself in the future? What’s next for you?
Latisha Simmons
Well, I still have some weight that I want to lose. Some of course. Everybody just keep doing what you’re doing. Just keep doing what you’re doing. And that’s what my plan is, is to keep doing what I’ve been doing because it’s been working for me.
You know, my daughter is excited about the progress that I’ve made. And she’s, you know, she’s hopeful that I’ll be able to come off these medications soon. So that’s obviously a big motivator for me. And again, knowing that if I go back to my old lifestyle that, you know, I’ve got some major consequences, you know, that I’ll be facing.
And so that’s, you know, a huge motivator for me to keep going and not only logistics, set an example for, you know, other people that may be going through this same, you know, situation, or I have family members that have some some of these similar health issues.
And, you know, I really want people to know that if you change your diet and your lifestyle, that you really can’t overcome some of these health issues that you might be facing, you know, even though you know, it is, you know, a genetic, you know, issue.
Sometimes that doesn’t necessarily mean that, you know, you have to just give up, you know, you still can, you know, fight and see, you know, can you change it, do all you can basically I’m trying to control what I can control, you know, I can’t control my genetics, I know that, but I definitely control you know, how much I exercise what I eat, you know, that whole thing, I like what I drink, and that has a big impact on, you know, the outcome here.
So, that’s definitely a big motivator for me. So my goal is to keep running from diabetes. And also, you know, just get some back to my goal weight, cause running wise, you know, once I get back to my goal weight, I want to set some some PR’s. Once I get back to that, I got a couple of races coming up. So that’s basically where I am.
But I’m excited about it for the first time ever, I actually feel like I can, once I get back to my race late in my healthy weight, that I can sustain it. And I have never felt like that in my entire life. So that is really just a wonderful feeling to have. And again, being able to do that and not feel deprived.
I mean, because if you feel like you miss an out or you feel deprived, you’re not gonna stick with it. But this type of lifestyle, you just don’t feel that way. At least I don’t. And I’m just super excited about it. And coming into it. I was just like, there’s no way I’m going to be able to be…
Patrick McGilvray
You were skeptical, you were a little skeptical. You’re like I don’t know about this guy. But we made a believer out of you, Latisha. So I just want to say thank you for coming on here and sharing your story.
And I also want to say that I’m really proud of you for just like, being courageous and making these changes, because it was hard for you at the beginning, you know, just to make that decision to like, go all in on yourself and to like, make these big changes in your life. That requires a lot of courage.
And a lot of people don’t have that, you know, a lot of people it’s just too scary for them, you know, but you you are like, I’m I’m going to make this happen. I’m going to do this, I’m going to fix my health. And yeah, you mentioned like diabetes being you know, genetic, you there’s a genetic predisposition predisposition for diabetes and insulin resistance and stuff like that. But it’s a lifestyle disease, you know, and you can absolutely change it with your lifestyle.
Just because you have the genetic predisposition does not mean the genes will be turned on. So if you don’t, you know, if you don’t feed the bad lifestyle, then the genes don’t get expressed, you know, and so you can definitely affect even a genetic disease, like diabetes with the right kind of lifestyle.
Latisha Simmons
Exactly. And, and I’m glad you brought that up. Because, you know, my doctor told me so I’m like, What do you mean? Like, I’ve never had this problem before. And she’s, you know, she’s like, because you’ve been keeping your weight under control, you know, you’ve been running and exercise and, and all of that.
So, you know, it didn’t show up. She said, but once you start eating what you want it to and, you know, started gaining all this weight, you know, then it showed up, she says so this has been there, but you’ve been able to control it with your lifestyle.
And so now that you know your lifestyle, it’s out of control, basically, here it is. I’m like, oh, so yeah, you bring up a good point. I mean, it’s just because it’s there and you can still control the lifestyle. And I’m definitely a believer of that now, because I’m seeing it. I mean, you know, it’s working. So I’m like..
Patrick McGilvray
Yeah, the whatever you want diet, that one doesn’t work for that. Even if you run it don’t matter. Doesn’t matter how much you run that diet doesn’t work.
Latisha Simmons
Yeah, I mean, I trained and did a 50k during that time. And so like I said, I was being austere running marathons and ultra marathons, but I’ll still eat what I wanted to and yeah, that didn’t help.
Patrick McGilvray
I mean that’s such a such a common story. Well, thank you again, Latisha. I appreciate you so much. And I’m so proud of you. And we’re gonna keep following your story here. I want you to keep us posted on your progress and let us know how this how these PRs go for you.
Latisha Simmons
Absolutely, I will do that. Thank you for having me, Patrick.
Patrick McGilvray
If you’re a runner and you’ve been struggling to lose weight or you keep losing and gaining the same 10 pounds over and over again. Or you’re finally ready to get to your natural weight and stay there for good this time then I have something you will love. I’ve created a powerful new training just for you called running lean for life. You’ll learn exactly how to transform yourself into a lean fat-burning running machine. So you can run without bonking, lose weight without calorie counting and develop the habits required to make it last for life. To get this free training right now go to runningleanpodcast.com/leanforlife and start your transformation today.
Honestly, there are probably more than 5 ways you sabotage your own success, but in this special edition of the Running Lean podcast, I’m talking about the BIG ones. I coach a lot of runners on …
Continue Reading about 69. 5 Ways You Sabotage Your Own Success →
My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster, and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.
Hey there, and welcome to episode 69 of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray and today I’m talking about five ways you sabotage your own success. Honestly, there are probably more than five ways you sabotage your own success. But in this special edition of the Running Lean podcast, I’m talking about the big ones.
So I coach a lot of runners on nutrition, weight loss, overall health, and fitness. And I see the same self-sabotaging behavior over and over again. Why do you do these things to yourself? Why can’t you ever seem to make any significant progress towards your goals? Why do you always seem to sabotage your own success?
So I mentioned that this is a special edition of the podcast because this episode is actually a recording of a live coaching session that I did recently over in the Running Lean podcast community on Facebook. So each Sunday, I go live in the Facebook group, and I do a little coaching and a little training, maybe dole out a little tough love.
And this particular session that I did last week received a lot of really positive feedback. So I thought it would be fun to share it with you here on the podcast. Speaking of the Facebook group, come and join us if you haven’t done so already. This is a group of runners that all share similar health and fitness goals.
It’s a great place to feel supported, encouraged, inspired, motivated, you can ask questions and get answers. And it’s just a fun group of people. We have a lot of fun over there. So just go to Facebook and search for Running Lean community. And click join us.
Here’s another five-star review of the Running Lean podcast. This one came from Karen recently and she says, “Top notch. Each week when I listen to Patrick’s podcast, I feel like he is directly talking to me. He is full of knowledge and truly has a passion for his field and his followers. His messages motivate me to sign up for my first half marathon and give up sugar and begin food journaling.”
That’s a lot of awesome stuff, Karen. Awesome, awesome, awesome. You won’t be disappointed. Thank you so much, Karen. And I would love it. If you would submit a five-star review of the podcast, wherever you listen to your podcast, whether it’s Apple podcast, Spotify, Google Play, whatever it is, wherever you can leave a review, I would love it means a lot to me if you did that. So thank you. Thank you very much for doing that.
And you know, I know I talk a lot about all this diet, nutrition, weight loss, even self-sabotage, talk about all this stuff. And it can seem it can be awesome and super helpful. But also it can feel a little overwhelming. And you probably want to know like, how do I just how do I get started? How do I make all this work for me? Well, I got you covered as a one-on-one coach.
This is what I do, I can help you make sense of all this. I can help you apply these principles to your own life. Listen, we’re all so different. We all have different metabolisms. We all have different body types, different genetics, different goals, and different likes and dislikes. And there’s just not one approach that works perfectly for everyone. It would be awesome.
If there was it would make my job a lot easier, but there’s not okay, there’s not one way. So the way my coaching works is we work together you and me to work up a metabolic profile for you. We clearly define your health and fitness goals. Then we put together a plan that is specifically tailored for you specifically designed to help you reach your particular goals.
I work with people who want to lose 30 pounds and run their first marathon. And they know they can’t do it carrying around all that extra weight. I work with people who want to lose 60, 80, or 100 pounds and can’t even run anymore. They just want to get back to running. They have to fix their diet first.
I work with some people who are already lean, and they want to get stronger and more powerful and maybe qualify for Boston or run their first ultra-marathon. And they understand the hugely important role that nutrition plays in their performance. So whatever your weight loss goals or running goals, I’m here to help you get there to learn more and apply for coaching, just go to runningleanpodcast.com/apply.
Okay, so like I said earlier, this is a recording of a recent Facebook Live I did over in the face Running Lean community on Facebook. So I’m just going to play this episode right now. I think you’re gonna love it. I got a lot of great feedback on this. So I hope you enjoy it. Here we go.
Hey, there Facebook friends. Hey there Running Lean community on Facebook. How’s everybody doing this fine Sunday afternoon? I hope you’re all enjoying the weather. I hope you’re getting some good weather wherever you are. Here in Cincinnati, it is a beautiful day. I have been going pretty hard with the running lately. And so I decided to take a day off today.
Usually, I don’t run on Sundays anyway. But I took a long walk today and listened to some cool podcasts. And I was just walking through the park and the sun was shining. And I just took my time and went all over the place ended up being about three miles or so. And man, just gorgeous outside. So if you haven’t been outside yet, get out there it is. Amazing.
So here’s what we’re doing, today is Sunday. And that means we’re gonna do a little coaching today, I got a little bold, tough love for you guys today. Okay. Because here’s what I want to talk about. We tend to sabotage our own success in multiple ways. There are many, many, many ways that we sabotage our own success.
And I’ve talked about a few of these things before, or I’ve talked about other ways that we sabotage ourselves. But I came up with these five because I’ve been seeing some trends recently with people and I’m like, you know what, I’m going to talk about this, I’m going to kind of point out these five things that we all do, I’ve done them. And but these five things are like they’re sabotaging what we want for ourselves. They’re thwarting our progress, and we need to make some changes, okay.
So what I’m going to do here is talk about these five things today, and hopefully, through the process, give you some insights and some tips to maybe not do these things, and some things to do instead. For the new people, I want to make sure that you guys are subscribed to the podcast. So definitely do that.
Even if you’re not new if you just haven’t subscribed to the podcast, what’s the matter with you? Get on that. It’s good. It’s good stuff. And here’s an ask for you guys today. I would love it if you could leave a review of the podcast. So I don’t know what platforms allow reviews other than Apple podcasts.
So if you’re an Apple podcast user, and you scroll down to the podcast, and you just tap the five stars, because you know five stars is that’s what you want to do right there. Right? And just leave a quick review. Letting other people know how much you love the podcast would mean a lot to me.
You know, I put a lot of work into this stuff that I do for you guys here. And occasionally I’m gonna ask you for things like, Hey, if you could leave a review, that would be amazing. And I’ll take you like two minutes. And it would really mean a lot to me. Okay. So Apple podcasts, leave a review, that would be awesome.
Also, if you haven’t done it already, there’s a free training that I created at the top of this group, it’s called How to Become A Lean Running Machine. Definitely check that out. It lays the foundation for the stuff that I teach here in this in this group and on the podcast, too. Okay. I also want you to participate in this group.
So if you’re one of these people that that comes and kind of lurks around, you’re just kind of like seeing what everybody’s doing and maybe get a little bit of inspiration and things like that. That’s awesome. But I would encourage you to participate to share a post, tell us a little something about yourself. What are you working on? What are you trying to accomplish? How can we help you?
Tell us something good, maybe you had a win this week, share that with us, we would love to hear about stuff like that or a struggle. And we can help you with that too. And encourage other people, post on other people’s comments on other people’s posts, you know, and engage with the group okay.
And then the last thing we’ll talk about before we get into today’s topic is that people have been asking how to directly work with me like I get messages on Instagram messenger and Facebook Messenger asking what do I do? If you want to work with me directly and have me as your coach this is probably the most effective way to get the results that you want with your health and fitness to make big changes and make them last to quit. Get a new mindset so that you can do this thing. Stick to your diet, you know, run a marathon, whatever it is you want for yourself.
I’ll help you, I’d love to help you, this is what I do. So all you got to do is go to runningleancoaching.com and then click on the link at the very top that says, work with me. And then you’ll have to apply and we’ll get on a Zoom call, and we’ll talk about it and see what your goals are, and see if this is actually a good fit for you.
But I would love to work with you this is what I do. This is what I’m good at. What I’m really good at is helping people figure out their nutrition dialed in their nutrition to support their weight loss to support their overall health and fitness and to support their running. And there are a lot of weight loss coaches out there, but they don’t have this focus on runners.
You know, I think they just think that runners are like good to go like, Oh, they run so they’re fine. Hey, we’re not fine. We need help, too. So that’s what I’m here for. Okay, just go to runningleancoaching.com and then click on work with me. I’d be glad to have a conversation with you and see if this is a good fit for you. It’s not a good fit for everybody. I totally acknowledge that. But for those that want the help. It’s pretty awesome.
So here’s my question for you guys as everybody’s jumping on. Hi, Amy. Hi, Joy. Hi, Candace. Hi, Laura. Hello, everybody. It’s so good to see you guys on here. I love this so much. It’s so fun. One of the reasons I created this Facebook group is because I wanted to be able to communicate with you guys.
You know, and the podcast is such a one-way thing I just talked him to a microphone and then you listen to it. But this is like we get to ask questions, and I get to hear from you and I get to engage with you. So this is really fun. I love this. And here’s my question for you today. All you people that are listening live right now, I want you to answer this question for me because I really want to know, what’s one way you sabotage yourself?
Like what is one thing you do that always sabotages your own success? How do you screw it up for yourself? What is it that you do that sabotages your success? Answer that question in the comments. And I’m going to get to those in a minute. Because I want to, I do want to answer those questions.
And I want to hear what you guys have to say about this. Because I want to actually address some of the things that you talk about here. And maybe what you have to share isn’t one of the five things that I’m gonna be talking about. So I would love to hear what you guys got. Okay, so what’s one way you sabotage your own success?
And this could be anything, it could be with work-related stuff with health and fitness with, you know, trying to stick to a diet, lose weight, trying to stick to a workout schedule, whatever it is, okay? Let me know. Alright, so while you guys are thinking about that, I’m going to dive into the topic here. Okay.
So the reason I’m talking about this like I mentioned at the top of this live is that I’ve been seeing some trends from people lately, I have a lot of conversations with people every single day. And whether they’re my clients or potential clients, or friends, whatever, I talk about this stuff every single day, and this is what I do.
And I hear people and I keep hearing the same things come up. And I ask people this question all the time. Like, why can’t you get x results on your own? How come you can’t seem to make this work for yourself? And I love asking people this question because it really gives me an insight into what people need really, what do they need help with the most?
Okay, so, when I ask that question, like, why can’t you make this work? Like what’s the reason why you haven’t been successful with you know, losing weight in the past? And it really uncovers what’s going on with people. And when I ask this question a lot, I start to see some trends. And I’ve noticed these five things.
So number one, the number one reason but not the number one reason but the first one I’m going to talk about is these are in no particular order. Okay. But the first reason that people seem to sabotage themselves is that they are not living up to their true potential you are capable of so much more.
I know it, other people know it. Other people can probably see it other people have probably told you that before have you ever been told you have so much potential? And you’re like yeah, whatever. That was always me. I always heard that from bosses and teachers and stuff like that. Early on in my life like you have so much potential but you’re not living up to your potential, you’re giving it your all, but you’re not tapping into that potential.
And we sort of carry this through our whole lives, you know, sometimes we get set up early on, and we think that you’re that we’re not capable of much like we can only do so much, we can only make so much money, we can only be so lean, we can only run so far. And I want to call BS on all of that, right here now.
Because like David Goggins talks about this 40% rule, you know, we’re living in about 40% of our potential, we’re living up to about 40% of our potential, most of us about 40%. I don’t know about you, but 40% is below average, and not even mediocre like it’s below mediocre if you ask me.
So the fact that most people in this world are only tapping into about 40% of what they’re capable of, sort of blows my mind a little bit. And I’m here to tell you, that you are capable of so much more than you give yourself credit for. And you’re, you’re hanging back, and you’re waiting for something to happen.
And you’re not going for this thing that you really want for yourself. I can’t tell you how many times I talk to people and I say, what do you really want for yourself, like, who do you want to become? And we have these emotional conversations where they tell me, you know, I’ve been heavy all my life, and I’ve struggled with my weight for so long. And I just want to be this, this lean, fit runner and I can see myself as this, you know, super healthy eater, and that’s what I want to be I want to work out all the time, I want to.
And then and then I say like, okay, now, what are you doing to get there? Nothing. Right? They want more for themselves, but they’re not doing anything about it. They’re only tapping into that 40%. They’re living in about 40%, 60% of the time, they’re like sitting on the couch, eating cookies, thinking about being healthy, and running is not going to work for you. Okay. 40% is not good enough. Not for me, not for you. Not for any of us. Okay?
Now, I’m not saying we got to live up to 100%. Like, we’re capable of so much more than we can even fathom. Yeah, but you know what it gets scary. Right? It’s scary when you start tapping into that untapped potential. What about 60%? What about 70%? What if you aim for just like 10% better?
What could you accomplish? If you could tap into just 10% more of your own tapped potential? Think about that. This is powerful. Right? I am always striving for more I say this all the time, like my goal in life. My goal in life is not to be happy. My goal is to become more. My goal in life is not to, you know, make a million dollars or you know, be this like zen you know, person with no worries or anything like that.
I want to become more and becoming more means that we get uncomfortable means we deal with unhappiness, sometimes we deal with all these human emotions, right? And, and I’m okay with that. I’m okay with doing what it takes to become more. Okay, so for me, I’m always moving in the direction of more. So I don’t know what percentage I’m tapping into. But it’s more than 40% at this point in my life. Right? And it requires you to like, dig down deep sometimes. And get there but you can do it. Okay.
So, the first thing I want to say to you is you’ve got to want to become more. You have to want that for yourself. Okay, I want that for you. You need to want it for you. Right, so 40% It’s not good enough, right? Let’s go for more. Okay, that’s number one. That’s number one. I’m just looking to see if there’s anything I want to talk about here. Huh?
Amy says, thinking that if I go off my plan with one thing then I may as well have a free pass to eat whatever I want for the rest of the day. Yep. Laura says I tell myself I’m just gonna have a bite of my kid’s snack and then I say eff it. I’m just going to finish the bag now. Yep.
Marla says rewarding myself with a treat after each workout. Yep. Debbie says doubting my abilities. Yes. Right there. Right there, Debbie is the 40% talking, okay? You’re doubting your abilities, you’re doubting your capability to give more to become more. Okay, so these are great you guys.
And this whole idea of like rewarding ourselves, like, I’m going to eat really healthy. And then, you know, once I do that for a couple of weeks straight, I’m gonna reward myself with a really crappy meal of a bunch of sugar. Does this make any sense? No, it doesn’t make any sense. Okay?
It’s like saying to the alcoholic, hey, you haven’t drank for like three months, you know what you should do? Reward yourself and get good and drunk? Not a good idea. Okay. Okay, so number one is not living up to your true potential, 40%. We need more.
Number two is procrastination. I’ll do it later. We say this all the time. This is one thing that I hear from people. And it drives me crazy. Because again, I say like who is it that you want to become? All I want to become is this healthy person, I want to become this fit person. I want to lose this weight. I want to get started. I’m like, so ready to do this. Okay.
All right, let’s do it. Let’s do some coaching. Like, you know, it costs a little bit of money. You know, let’s do it. Let’s sign you up. Let’s get started. You know, let’s, oh, you know what? I’m, I’ll do it later. I don’t really have the money right now. I don’t really have the time right now. You know or I’ve got something going on. I’ve got this project at work, I need to finish first, you know, or, or my daughter’s getting married. Here.
Like, I mean, there are a million excuses, we can come up with why we need to put something off until later. Later, later, later. I’m going to do it later. We just keep saying that to ourselves, though. You never get anywhere, you never do anything later. You might as well just say never. Okay, later is the killer of more hopes and dreams.
Because you’re delaying something, you know, you feel good about something right now you feel motivated, you want to take action today. And then you say, you know what, though, maybe later I’ll do it. And I’ll think about it. And then you end up just never doing anything, you never take action. And then you just feel bad about yourself.
I see this a lot. I see people that you know, want to work with me or they want to get healthy, they want to lose weight, they want to run a marathon. And then, you know, we talk about that. And we talk about what it’s going to look like to do that. And a lot of times they’re just not ready. I get that.
But you know what, when do you get ready? When are you going to have the time, when you’re going to be ready, when it all one or all the stars gonna align so that there’s nothing else going on where everything’s just gonna work out perfectly? It’s not gonna happen, I promise you, it’s never ever, ever going to happen.
And you know, this idea of like, not having enough money, either. I get that and to invest in something like, like a coach to help you. It’s a little bit of money. It’s not a huge amount, but it’s a little bit of money. And a lot of people say I don’t have the money. When I have some extra money, I’m going to do this for sure.
When do you have extra money? Do you guys ever have extra money? I don’t. I never have extra money. I wish I did. That would be amazing, but I never do. I wish I had extra money. I guarantee though, if your car needed, like new tires, or if your dishwasher broke, and you needed a new one you could come up with, you know, $1200 bucks today to do that. Right?
Because that’s important to you and like, you know, you’ve got to have transportation or you got to have a dishwasher. Actually, you don’t have to have a dishwasher. I have a dishwasher. You can see it right back there. I haven’t used it in a year, because it’s just me. What am I gonna do put one dish in there and turn it on? No, by the time I fill it up. I don’t have any dishes to use. So I just wash them as I go.
Anyhow, you can get along just fine without a dishwasher, but I guarantee you, you could find the time the money whatever you need to do for things that you deem important to you. What about your health? Isn’t that important to you? You? What about losing that 50 pounds? Isn’t that important to you?
What about getting to become that person you ultimately want to become? Isn’t that important to you? I say yes, it is. Let me give you an example of something that I just did recently because this was one of these things where I was procrastinating on this, okay.
I haven’t taken a vacation. I haven’t taken any time off from work in like a year and a half like I have not stopped. I have not been out of Cincinnati, in a year and a half. Okay. And I know a lot of us are in the same boat, especially since the lockdown, but I’ve been itching to get out of here and take a trip. I love going to the beach.
So I have been thinking about this beach trip. And I was like, ah, when I have more money when I have the time when this happens when that happens. And I finally found myself, you know, procrastinating and saying later and using all these things to delay this thing that I really wanted for myself.
And so today, this morning, I was like, screw it. I’m just gonna take this trip got on Airbnb or VRBO, whatever it was booked to place, got my plane tickets. I’m good to go. It’s all good. I’m going over Memorial Day weekend, I’m going to have a good time going on a little vacation. And I feel so good about it because I stopped saying later. Right?
So if you want something and it’s important to you, you’ve gotta take action on it. Okay, there’s no better time than right now. I promise you. Delay is a killer delay that will kill you. Okay, so stop procrastinating.
Okay, so number three is a good one. I’ve talked a lot about this topic. And number three, the third reason why we sabotage our own success is because we quit when things get uncomfortable. Have you ever quit because something got uncomfortable? I have. I tried so hard to lose weight so many times. And as soon as it got uncomfortable, or I had to do something I didn’t want to do you know, or give up certain foods I didn’t want to give up. I gotta tell you, I just quit. I was like, screw this. If I can’t eat, you know, ice cream, and pizza and tacos all the time? Is it worth it? What is life, if I can’t eat donuts whenever I want to.
Because it’s uncomfortable to make big changes like this, okay. I know people that are training for ultra marathons and training for marathons. And they’re willing to get uncomfortable. Because they know in order to succeed with this thing they want to do you know, if you want to run a 50k or 100 miles.
I’ve got this one friend who’s training for the grand canyon from rim to rim to rim. So you go down and up the other side and then back down and back up again. Right. I don’t know something like 43 miles total, but the elevation gain is crazy. And like you got to do this in one day, you know, got to do it before it gets dark out. And that’s a hell of an ultra to prepare for. You know, do you think he’s getting uncomfortable training for this thing? Absolutely.
He’s running up. He keeps finding more hills around him and he just keeps running up. Okay, today I did six hills or a seven or eight or nine or ten whatever it is, and he keeps increasing the number of hills he’s running. I think it’s awesome and sounds terrible. But he’s like willing to get uncomfortable, right?
Because here’s the thing you guys, all this stuff that you want that you don’t have already is outside your comfort zone. Everything that you want for yourself, but don’t have yet is going to require you to get uncomfortable to get it. Discomfort is the currency for success. Discomfort is the cost. It’s what you have to pay in order to to be successful. In order to accomplish whatever big thing you want to accomplish.
Discomfort is the price you pay. It’s non-negotiable. You have to get uncomfortable. If it was comfortable and easy. You already have it. Anything you want. This person you want to become this person you see yourself as this thin, lean, strong runner, this powerful runner who’s lost all the weight and feels amazing about herself. That’s going require you to get uncomfortable to get there.
Are you willing to do that? Most people say yes. But most people, when it starts to really get uncomfortable quit. Most people can’t handle it once they get out there. And when I tell people things are gonna get uncomfortable, they say I’m all in, Patrick. Like yeah, let’s do it. I’m ready to get uncomfortable.
And then things start to get uncomfortable. And they’re like, well, well, well, well, that this is not what I signed up for. I’m like, hey, remember, I said it was gonna get uncomfortable. This is what we’re talking about. It is literally uncomfortable. Right? We don’t like it. We don’t like to be uncomfortable.
But you guys, whatever it is you want it’s going to require you to go through some period of discomfort to get it. Okay. Losing weight is not an easy thing to do. For most people, the way I do it with people, there’s a short discomfort period, there’s a short, uncomfortable period. But it’s pretty short, though. I promise you. But then I have this philosophy with my clients, and I want losing weight to be enjoyable and relatively effortless. And fun. Yes, fun.
We don’t have to suffer through our weight loss journey. We don’t have to suffer our way to good health. It doesn’t have to be that way. It can be fun. It can be enjoyable. Is there some discomfort? Yes. Do we also work on making it enjoyable and fun? Yes, we do. Okay, but you have to be willing to endure the discomfort and not quit. Most people can’t do that though.
And I get it. It’s hard. It’s hard to do. It’s hard to do on your own. I acknowledge that. This is one of the main reasons I come on here and talk to you guys is one of the main reasons I have this podcast. This is the main reason that I do my one-on-one coaching with people is because when it gets uncomfortable, most people quit.
When things aren’t working, when they face challenges, when maybe their weight loss stalls or their running sucks for a period of time. Most people just quit. They’re like, I can’t do it. It’s too hard. But when you got me there, in your cheering squad, I’m your little cheering squad. But I’m also there to kick in the butt a little bit and keep you moving with love. Right?
There’s a little, a little tough love going on. And kind of like what I’m doing out here today. You know, just a little bit of tough love. Right? Okay, so let’s recap where we are. So far, five ways we sabotage our success number one, not living up to your true potential, 40% – it’s not good enough. Number two, procrastination later, is the killer of hopes and dreams. Three, we quit because it gets uncomfortable.
Number four, you don’t honor the commitments you make to yourself. This is a big one, you guys, if you say you’re going to do something, do it. If you say I’m not eating cookies today, don’t eat cookies today. Because here’s what happens. Every time you say I’m not going to eat cookies today, and then you eat the cookies anyway; you train your brain that you can just do whatever the f you want.
Anytime you feel like you have this urge to eat some cookies, you’re training your brain that you’re just gonna reward that urge with some cookies. And you’re gonna get really good at that. Right, you get good at what you practice, right? When you don’t honor the commitments you make to yourself. You just get good at not honoring commitments, you get good at giving in. You get good at caving under the pressure. Okay. This will definitely sabotage your success.
One of the big, big, big things you have to do if you’re going to take on something big, like losing too much weight training for some big event, whatever it is, like you have to got to have a plan, right? You got to have a plan. And then you have to commit to the plan. And then you have to follow through with the commitment.
That’s the important part is the following through with the commitment. Anybody can have a plan. Anybody can put it on their calendar. Anybody can write it down on a piece of paper. Do you do it? Because if you don’t, you’re just going to fail. You’re going to continue to fail after time and time and time again. And you’re going to train yourself that it’s okay to do that. This is not good enough, in my opinion. You have to honor the commitments you make to yourself when you do when you say I’m not eating cookies today, and then, you know, there comes a point in the day where you’re like, I would really love some cookies, but not going to do it.
When you interrupt that pattern, when you don’t eat the cookies, even though you want them, oh, that’s cool, because now you’re training your brain that you don’t reward it. When it wants something like that. Then you’re training your brain, hey, I honor commitments I make to myself, this is beautiful when you can do this good.
You guys, when you practice doing this over and over and over again. And it takes a lot of practice. But when you get good at this, you build trust in yourself. You build resilience, you build confidence. And you build this relationship with yourself that like you can do any frickin thing that you want to. Okay?
Because when you give in all the time, you’re just telling yourself, you’re like that 40% rule, right? You’re just like giving in. I can’t do it. I’m not good enough. I can only give about 40% 60% of the time, I’m just gonna say screw it. No, no, no, no, you got to honor those commitments you make to yourself. Okay, when you do you build so much confidence and trust in yourself. And it’s like, that’s where you become this total badass, right?
Because, you know, you can show up and you can get through anything, you go out to dinner with friends. And they’re all like eating bread, or dessert, or whatever it is, you can be like, I’m good. I don’t need any of that stuff. I don’t eat that anymore. And they’re gonna be like, whoa, what is up with you? What’s gotten into you? And you’re gonna be like, I’m good over here.
You know, I’m just gonna eat this big ol’ steak. Alright, so we’re either building ourselves up and building up resilience and building up confidence in ourselves, or we’re like tearing ourselves down. We’re like letting ourselves down every day, we got to stop doing that. Okay?
Honor the commitments you make to yourself. It’s great that you make commitments to yourself, honor those commitments, okay? Train yourself that you can do this over and over again, right? Practice doing that, okay.
And then the last way that we sabotage our own success. And this one, this is a big one. And this is a very, this is a tough one. But here’s what we do we compare ourselves to others, we have to stop doing that. We have to stop comparing ourselves to others. There’s a lot of pressure out there to look a certain way, be a certain way. Especially in the health and fitness industry, health and fitness world.
You know, if you scroll through Instagram, you’re gonna see, you know, dudes with just rockhard, six-pack abs and giant arms and, you know, super lean, thin women. And whatever it is, you know, lots of big butts, you know, this is what Instagram looks like when I scroll through my feed or whatever. And it’s really easy to compare ourselves to others and look and say, oh, that person looks better than me. Or that person can run faster than me, or that person is thinner than me. Or that person was able to lose the weight easily, and so hard for me.
We can get really down on ourselves when we compare ourselves to other people. Here’s the thing we don’t really know what’s going on with anybody else. I think some of these posts that people put on Instagram, then look at me, and they, they’ll be like, eight weeks difference. And it’ll be like this big, you know, very overweight person, and then this completely rockhard person over here, you know.
They lost all the weight and I’m just like, I don’t know about that. You know, I’ve worked with a lot of people we help people lose a lot of weight and I’ve never seen anything quite like that. So anyway, I think there’s some of that is a little BS but here’s the thing.
We have this like ideal out there that we’re trying to all aspire to. And we’ve just got to stop doing that. All right, because you the way you are right now in this moment, I’m going to tell you something, you better listen to me right now. You are amazing. You’re beautiful. I love you and you are just capable of so much. I love you exactly the way that you are because you are freaking amazing and unique. And you have so much to offer. That’s what I believe about you.
You need to believe that about you too and stop comparing yourself to somebody else. I’ve done it. I look at all these other people you know, I’m working on getting like a little more built-up or whatever but I have little arms still. You know I’m not a big giant burly dude. I’m working on it though. Right?
But I don’t compare myself to other people. I know that I’m amazing just the way that I am right now. And I have so much to offer in this world. And I’m not afraid to come here in front of you guys and be vulnerable with you and share this stuff with you. Because I think it’s important.
You know, I’m not comparing myself to what other people are doing. There are other people that do stuff like what I do that, that have these great big podcasts with millions of followers, and they have, you know, they’re coaching people and whatever, I don’t really care, I’m doing things my own way.
I don’t walk around looking at what other people are doing, I try not to, when I’m scrolling through Instagram or Facebook, I’m looking for funny stuff. Usually, I’m looking for funny memes. And I just want to like, get out of my head for a minute and just laugh about something.
I might scroll through the news and just see like, you know if there’s an asteroid coming or anything like that, but for the most part, I don’t, I don’t read the news. It’s too depressing. It’s very negative, I don’t want to get caught up and all that stuff. And I don’t want to get caught up comparing myself to other people. I just want to be here in my own skin, and be comfortable with who I am here today.
Okay, and I want to encourage you to do the same thing. It is totally okay to love yourself exactly as you are right here now. And it is totally okay to love yourself exactly as you are and want to better yourself want to become healthier, want to lose some weight, want to run further run faster like you couldn’t want more for yourself.
But you got to love yourself through that process. You can’t hate yourself thin, you have to love yourself just as you are. Stop comparing yourself to other people, you don’t know what’s going on with them. Also, just keep that in mind. A lot of times we see these people, and we think there have these amazing lives, and they might be miserable inside, you know, you never know what people are going through. Okay.
So when we say we’re not as fast as other people are, we’re not as thin as other people, or we’re not as beautiful as other people. Or we’re not as far along in our weight loss journey as other people. That doesn’t do us any good at all. There’s no point in doing any of that stuff. Okay, so stop doing that. This is my final suggestion for you guys today.
And because it’s serious, like we can really thwart our progress when we keep comparing ourselves, I should be here and I’m not, you know, I should lose two pounds a week, every single week, or I’m a piece of crap. No, you’re not. And no, it’s not supposed to work that way. It’s all over the board as far as how much you’re going to lose or whatever. Don’t compare yourself. Stop doing that. Okay?
So those are five things, you’re not living up to your true potential. Procrastination, we keep saying later. Don’t say later. Do it now. Whatever you want to do start today start now telling you, you’re gonna feel so much better about yourself. If you just take action today. We quit because it gets uncomfortable. We don’t honor the commitments we make to ourselves, we make the commandments, but we don’t honor them. And we compare ourselves to others. Those are the five things, the five biggest ways that we sabotage ourselves.
Okay, so I hope you guys got something out of this today. I’m going to just scroll through a few of these comments really quickly you guys, okay. Lots of good comments, you guys. Let’s see.
Debbie says I’ve been very disciplined for over three years, and I’ve lost 95 pounds. What? That’s amazing, Debbie, so proud of you. Recently, I’ve allowed myself to cave off makes me feel like such a failure. Yeah. Why are you allowing yourself to cave? That’s a question you want to ask yourself? Why are you thinking it’s okay to cave?
And we get into this mindset of like, oh, you know, weight loss is this thing you do and then once you get there, you just do whatever you want. No, it doesn’t work that way. What I do with my clients is I train them well, I help to train them to eat healthy for the rest of their life. All right, it’s a big change that we make. And it’s something that we need to do forever.
Okay, it’s not a short-term thing. It’s like, how can we make this sustainable for the rest of our lives and it’s a little different for everybody. There’s not like one formula that works for every person. But what I do has helped them get to the point where, when they’re done working with me, they know what they need to just stay doing that for the rest of their life. It’s not a short-term thing, it’s not a destination you’re trying to get to, you know, you lost 95 pounds. Debbie, that is so amazing.
Sometimes the harder part is like to keep it off, right? Because you don’t have this mindset of like, I’m trying to lose anymore. And so you can kind of thwart yourself by getting into this mindset of like, I can do whatever I want. I can cave. Okay? Can you though?
Maybe you’re the kind of person that like, shouldn’t cave because whatever that means for you means that you’re gonna start gaining weight again. I know that’s the case for me. If I go back to doing what I was doing before, I’m gonna start gaining weight again. I’m gonna get fat again. I don’t want to be that person anymore. So I’m okay with just doing this. I’ve made this a lifestyle change right.
Baelor says I lost 80 pounds when the pandemic started just by not eating fast food. Okay, that is amazing. That is amazing. Good job. Yeah. Total lifestyle change there. Ballerina mark. Candice was talking about negative self-talk. And yeah, this is something we do. Yeah. Good stuff, you guys. Really good stuff.
And I’m glad you guys are here for this today. I’ll go through and look through if there are any more comments and answer them in the comments myself, okay. But I hope you got something out of this today. And again, if you wouldn’t mind, I would love it. If you could find the Running Lean podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave a review. It means so much to me, just as a way of saying thank you, that would be awesome and amazing. Okay.
So these five things I talked about today, I want to encourage you to stop doing them. Okay? Just like we got to like, shift our mindset, okay. And we got to like, notice that we’re doing these things. That’s just the first step just notice that you do these things, you’ll start to see them, you’ll start to see yourself doing these things.
That is such an amazing first step awareness is so amazing. Once you see that you’re procrastinating, or you see that you’re, you quit because things get uncomfortable or you’re not honoring those commitments to yourself or you’re not living up to your full potential. Are you find yourself comparing yourself to others. When you see yourself doing this, just acknowledge that oh, that’s me comparing myself to somebody else. Oh, this is me not tapping into my full potential. Just be aware. That’s the first step. Right. Cool. Awesome, you guys. Great hanging out with you today.
I’ll drop in the comments and answer other questions. But hope you all have an amazing rest of your day. Get out there and enjoy the beautiful sunshine. If it’s sunny where you are hope it is. Love you. I’ll talk to you soon. Bye.
If you’ve tried to lose weight by running miles and miles or starving yourself and you’ve had zero results, you are not alone. This model of weight loss is broken. It’s never worked, and it has to be replaced. That’s why I created a powerful new training just for you called How to Become a Lean Running Machine.
You’ll discover why running more and eating less does not work for weight loss, and you’ll learn the three secrets to losing weight and keeping it off for good. To get this free training right now just go to runningleanpodcast.com/lean and learn how you can become a lean running machine.
I’ve seen a lot of social media posts and comments lately where people are sharing their frustration around the scale. They weigh themselves and if the scale hasn’t moved in the right direction, …
My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster, and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.
Hey there, and welcome to episode 66 of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray, sports nutritionist personal trainer health, and fitness expert, and weight loss coach for runners. And today, I’ve got a very fun topic. Very fun, I’m being a little sarcastic. You may not think this is very fun. I think it’s fun. Eliminating scale drama.
So I’ve seen a lot of social media posts and, and comments on posts lately where people are talking about the scale. And they’re sharing their frustration around the scale. So people are weighing themselves and if the scale isn’t moving in the right direction, they get all down on themselves, they feel depressed, they feel disappointed. And and a lot of times they just give up. All right.
So they’re creating all this drama for themselves because of a number on a device that is used to measure your body weight. Right? And then the suggested solution to the problem is to just don’t weigh yourself, you know, weigh yourself less often or don’t do it at all. And to me, this doesn’t make any sense.
If you’re having an emotional experience around a number on the scale. Does avoiding the scale really solve anything? No. So in this episode of the podcast, I’m going to dole out a little bit of tough love. I love you guys, but sometimes I gotta get tough with you. I want to explain exactly what scale drama is, how it is impacting your life, and how to eliminate all of that scale drama for good. All right, stay with me, you’re gonna like this one or not. It’s okay though.
If you haven’t already done it, please come check out the Running Lean community on Facebook. This is a fun group of positive runners who are there to support each other, and encourage each other. We talk about our goals, we share our experiences, we ask questions, and it’s fun, and we have a good time. So just come find us on Facebook. The podcast and the Facebook group kind of go hand in hand.
So I do a little bit of teaching in the Facebook group as well it kind of goes along with the stuff I teach you on the podcast. So definitely check out the Facebook group because you’ll get a good well-rounded feel for exactly what it is I’m teaching here and it’s a good adjunct to the podcast.
Also, spring enrollment is now open for the Running Lean monthly coaching group. This is my monthly membership program. In a support group where you get everything you need to make lasting changes to your health and fitness. We’re talking about knowledge, support, and accountability.
I talked about these three things last week in the podcast, right. And the Running Lean monthly coaching group, I created because it has all three of those things in one place. So you get the knowledge, which is my entire library of online training materials, and self-paced videos that you can go through and learn at your own pace.
Like the weight loss training course for runners, this is like everything you need to know about becoming fat-adapted, what to eat, what not to eat, how to break through weight-loss plateaus, how to manage hunger, and cravings, and so much more. You can go through all of this at your own pace. And then start implementing what you learned and start getting some results.
But then, if you have questions or struggles or something doesn’t make sense to you, you can bring all of that to the group, okay. And that’s where the support piece comes in. So we have this group of people that are all in this together, right, we’re all doing this together.
Of course, you get my expertise and my experience as a sports nutritionist, a personal trainer, and a master life coach, but it’s not just about me, it’s about the support from a community of people like you. Some people have some good experiences they can share.
You know, we share our experience, our strength is our hope with each other, you know, we’re vulnerable, we share with what we’re struggling with, and we offer our support or encouragement, and we lift each other up, and we help each other. This is the power of the group.
When we do try to do some hard things on our own. It’s hard. It’s challenging, it’s frustrating, but when we do hard things together, it’s motivating. It’s energizing, we’re much more likely to succeed.
And then the third piece is the accountability piece. Showing up in this group means you’re going to be held accountable to stay on track and move towards your goals. You know, if you want to make changes last you have to have accountability. You’re much more likely to stick with a healthy eating plan or an exercise regimen if you have to report to the group and say, yeah, I did what I said I was going to do. That’s powerful.
Okay, so the three biggest reasons why I created this group is because it has the knowledge, support, and accountability all in one place. All right, we do live group coaching via zoom. All the group coaching calls are recorded and archived. So you can always go back and watch something you missed, or rewatch something.
And we have a lot of fun, I believe, and making big changes in our lives, like changing our diet, losing weight, you know, getting stronger, getting faster can be fun, and enjoyable. We don’t have to suffer our way to good health. Right. So the group aspect of this program makes all of this a lot more fun.
So the spring enrollment is open. Now, I don’t open this group very often, maybe once a quarter. So if you want to take advantage of this, is this something you’ve been thinking about? Now’s the time to do it. Okay, I’m going to be closing the doors at the end of the day. On Sunday, April, the fourth, so 11:59 pm, Sunday, April 4, done for a few months.
Start today, and think about how much further you will be in three or four months. Right? Do you want to just be where you are today in three or four months? Or do you want to be like three or four months into a healthy eating regimen? The choice is yours. Always. Just go to runningleanpodcast.com/join.
Learn how to dial in your nutrition, make healthy eating a way of life, become a badass fat-adapted, bonk-proof runner, and have fun doing it. I promise you it is fun. runningleanpodcast.com/join and join us. It’ll be fun, I promise.
Okay, let’s get into this topic today, which is eliminating scale drama. Like I said earlier, sometimes I gotta be a little tough with you guys got to dole out a little bit of tough love. And today is one of those days.
So I’ve been seeing a lot of posts out there in the Facebook group and on other Facebook groups and just in on social media in general posts and comments about the scale. You know, why you should or should not weigh yourself and how often you should weigh yourself.
Even people suggest that you never weigh yourself just stop doing it. It’s too frustrating. And I have these conversations at least once a day with people, sometimes clients who get frustrated. And today I want to make my stance on this topic very clear. Right? Not everyone is going to agree with me on my approach. And that’s totally fine with me.
We all have our own opinions, we get to decide what’s best for ourselves. Okay, if you have a different idea, a different way of doing it. Awesome. You do you, but at least be open to hearing me out today. Because I think I think we could all use a little help around this issue, this issue of scale drama.
So what is scale drama? Scale, drama is all that stuff. You tell yourself what the number on the scale means about you. So let’s say you start eating healthier, you’re exercising, you’re making some healthy changes in your life, and you’re starting to feel pretty good, right? You’re feeling pretty good about yourself.
And then you step on the scale, and you haven’t lost any weight. You know, let’s say your goal is to lose 40 pounds. And you’ve been doing this for a couple of weeks and you feel good. And you get on the scale and it hasn’t moved. Or maybe it went up a pound. And then this is where all the drama comes in.
You have all these stories that you start telling yourself all these thoughts come up all these feelings come up. It’s so frustrating. This is not working. Oh no, I’m gonna have a bad day. This is so disappointing. This is depressing. This whole thing is just stupid. Screw it, I give up. And have you ever had any of these thoughts or feelings about the number that you see on the scale? I know you have, we all have.
I started so many different diets and quit them because I was having all these frustrating feelings. It was depressing to me. It didn’t I didn’t think it was working. And I did that I like stopped weighing myself, man.
Maybe I weighed myself once a week. And then then I was just frustrated that one time a week. You know what I mean? It didn’t help. So this is where this is what I’m talking about when I talk about scale drama. It’s all the stories and all the stuff we make up about what all this means about us. Okay.
So when people start doling out this advice, like only weigh yourself once a week or only weigh yourself once a month. only weigh yourself right after you’ve run 20 miles because that always looks good. Or just stop weighing yourself at all. Their intentions are good with this kind of advice. But honestly, I think this is misguided.
The idea here is that if you only weigh yourself every now and then you’re only going to feel disappointed or frustrated or depressed every now and then. Right? So it’s like, if you avoid the scale, except for once a month, you can like sneak up on it. When all the stars are aligned and you’ll hopefully get the number that will make you finally feel good about yourself.
So you wait a month, and you’re doing all the right things. At least you think you are. And then you step on the scale. You’re like, you sneak up on it, you step on it really fast. And you’re like, dang it, I’m up two pounds, then all that frustration comes back, the disappointment comes back, the depression all comes rushing back.
But you’re only doing it once a month. So like this is a much better plan, right? No, this is dumb to me, right? I don’t think this makes any sense at all. You can’t sneak up on the scale, right? You’re not looking at this from the right place, you’re not looking at the problem, the scale is not the real problem.
I don’t even say your current weight isn’t even the problem has nothing to do with how much you weigh. The real problem is how you think, and how you feel about yourself. All of this drama that you have around the scale, that’s all you. You create the drama, all the sadness, all the frustration, all the disappointment you’re experiencing. Those are all emotions.
And we know that emotions are always caused by thoughts. So if we’re feeling emotions about ourselves, it’s because we have these thoughts about ourselves. This is such a pervasive issue. I get it and these emotions are very strong, right?
They even create issues around your self-worth. I hear people say things like this all the time, like, they don’t feel like they’re good enough. Based on a number on a scale, you know, they’re comparing themselves to other people, or to where they think they should be.
You know, because they gained three pounds, they’re not good enough, you end up basing your own worthiness, your self-worth, on a number on a bodyweight measuring device, this is insane. A number on a scale cannot tell you how worthy you are. Because here’s a fact, for all of you. You were 100% born worthy. What the scale can tell you as the scale can tell you how much you weigh like it’s just a tool to measure the weight of your entire body.
The scale can tell you how much your bones, your skin, your organs, your muscles, your blood, your fat, and your hair weigh, that’s it. And every part of your body is made up of water, your body is actually 60% water at least sometimes up to 70% water. So 60% of the weight we’re looking at is actually water anyway, right?
So how much your bones and your skin and your organs weigh has nothing to do with your worthiness as a human being. It has nothing to do with how beautiful and amazing you are. It has nothing to do with whether or not you are enough. Because you were born enough. How much do you weigh? It’s just a data point, right?
It’s just a fact like your shoe size or how tall you are doesn’t mean you’re a good person or a bad person. It’s just data unless you make it mean something. It’s like saying, oh, my feet are so big. And I’m so short. It’s so frustrating. I’m like a hobbit, by the way. The hobbits were the real heroes of that story.
Okay, at the end of Return of the King, after Eric Aragorn gets crowned king, everybody’s bowing to him, and he looks to the hobbits and he says, my friends, you bow to no one. Oh my god, that gives me chills every time I love, love, love that movie.
Doesn’t mean anything. But what are you making it mean? What are you making that number on the scale mean about you? We have these thoughts like it’s not working. I’m a failure. I’m not good enough. I can’t do this. I’ll never lose weight. But none of this is true unless you make it true.
None of this is true unless you believe it. You always have a choice in what you believe about yourself. Right? If you believe it It’s not working, you’ll find evidence that it’s not working like a number on a scale, it went up, and so you quit. If you believe you’ll never lose weight, you won’t, promise you.
If you believe you’re a failure, you will always fail. Always. I hope you’re starting to see that this all sounds pretty insane. If you’re experiencing any of this drama, and I know we all have at some point or another if you’re having a good day or a bad day, and you’re determining your self-worth, based on some arbitrary number on a $29 bathroom scale, we’ve got to fix this. Okay, we have to fix this.
The scale is just a measuring device. There are other measuring devices out there. Like if you really want to know about body composition, you can do girth measurements, where you measure your waist and arms and thighs, you do some calculations, you can do skinfold thickness measurements, bioelectrical impedance, hydrostatic weighing, like a bod pod, you can do a DEXA scan, all of these things will give you data. They’re all just numbers. Again, they don’t mean anything about you.
But having this info can help you to make decisions about what’s working, what’s working with your nutrition and exercise program, and what isn’t. But that’s all I can do. It can’t tell you whether you’re a good person or a bad person, it can’t determine if you’re going to have a good day or a bad day. Why do we do this to ourselves?
What do we do about this, though? Like, how do we eliminate the scale drama? So the first thing I’ll tell you is just stop it, stop doing it. Stop making that number on the scale mean something about you, it doesn’t mean anything about you. Okay, it’s just a number. It’s just data. And we’ll talk about this in a minute, like what we can do with that data, but just stop making it mean something, okay?
So here’s how we do it like, this is where people will disagree with me. My suggestion to you is this, weigh yourself every single day, do it at the same time every day, record your weight in a log or a journal or an app, whatever is easy for you.
And then you’re going to this stuff is going to come up, you’re going to feel disappointed, frustrated, depressed, whatever, just sit back and like, let that stuff come up. Okay, it will come up, and that’s fine.
But here’s what I want you to understand. This is important. Every single day, your weight will fluctuate every single day. It always will from now until the end of time, your weight will go up, and it will go down every single day. You just have to accept this. I have never seen anybody lose weight, whether it was five pounds, or 50 pounds, or 100 pounds, and I’ve helped people lose all that kind of weight; I’ve never seen it just go straight down from one day to the next.
Always down, down, down down. Never ever, ever works that way. Okay, so let’s just accept this. I’ve been recording my weight every day for like a year now. And it still goes up and down. One to three pounds every single day. But I’ve maintained the same weight for months and months and months.
Like it’s just not a problem. But it does go up and it goes down and it goes up and it goes down. Sometimes I know why sometimes I have no idea why. And at first, it used to freak me out. It’s like, oh, my gosh, you went up. What does this mean? And maybe it’s not working? Maybe I need to change something. But then it goes down again. And I’m like, oh, okay, good. Yeah.
But then it just keeps happening and keeps happening and keeps happening. And you’re like, what? A year later, it still happens every single day. I still write down my weight every single morning. Do you think I make it mean anything now? Heck, no, I do not. It means nothing. Your weight will fluctuate every single day.
So what let’s just embrace it, let’s just accept this fact. Okay. And it has to do with water retention, whether you’re dehydrated or not hormonal changes, hormonal responses, and a slew of other things that I just can’t explain. But just know that it’s normal. It is perfectly normal for the scale to go up and down for your way to go up and down.
So instead of avoiding the scale, here’s my advice to you embrace it. Instead of sneaking up on the scale, face it head-on every single day, and build up some resilience to it. I promise you, if you do this every single day, you’re gonna see that it’s totally normal for that number to go up and down.
And losing weight is never linear. It’ll always go up and down. Alright, always, always, always; don’t avoid it. Let’s start accepting it. Just create some acceptance around that. And it takes repetition, you just have to keep doing it. Now, of course, you have to deal with the drama. Right? The drama will still be there in the beginning, it’ll get better, but you’re going to have to deal with it, right?
So step one is to just weigh yourself every day, except the fact that your weight will fluctuate every single day, it should trend down, if you’re trying to lose weight, you’re doing it the right way, the way that I recommend. Everybody that works with me, they trend down, it goes up and down, but they’re trending down.
We don’t gain weight. You know, in this nutrition regimen that I help people with, they don’t gain weight, we can keep ratcheting that weight down. But it does go up and down. But over time, it’s trending down. Okay. So step one, weigh yourself every day.
Step two, deal with the drama, get the drama out of your head, and get it onto a piece of paper. Right, think about what you’re making this number mean? What does it mean to you? What’s coming up for you? What do you? What stories are you telling yourself about this? What thoughts and feelings are coming up for you?
Oh, it’s depressing. It’s not working, I’m frustrated, like, Whatever, whatever is coming up, just write it all down, get it all down on the page, we’re creating massive awareness, here’s what we’re doing.
Okay, you’re gonna start to see all these negative thoughts, all these negative emotions you’re experiencing around the scale, you’re gonna see all the drama. And you’re gonna see what your brain is doing. And once you see what your brain is doing, all those stories are making up about this number and what it means about you and doesn’t mean about you, then you can start to deal with it right?
But you have to get it all out. First, you got to see what you’re thinking, right? You got to see what you’re feeling, get it out on the page, and then ask yourself, is this true? Is any of this true? Chances are no, it’s not true.
Also, ask yourself this question. This is a good one. This is a powerful question. What else could this mean about me? So maybe my weight went up? What does that mean? What else could it mean? If it doesn’t mean, it’s not working? What else could it mean? Maybe it means losing weight will take a little more time than I originally thought. Maybe it means that I’m a normal human being.
Maybe it means that I’m committed to making this work no matter what, even if it does go up every now and then. Maybe it means I need to change something. Oh, now we’re onto something here. Okay. We want to use the scale as a tool. I encourage people to weigh themselves every day, create awareness, and see that your weight will fluctuate over time. But then we also use it as a tool to make changes, right.
So if you hit some sort of stall and your weight loss, and you’re trying to break through a stall, and by the way, a true plateau in weight loss is like if you stay at the same number for like two straight weeks. Usually, if you’re at the same number for a couple of days, that’s not a plateau.
People tell me this all the time. They’re like, my weight hasn’t changed in three days, I’ve hit a plateau. I’m like, no, you haven’t. Let’s give it two weeks. And then we change something. Okay. So if you hit a stall, a true stall, you know, where it’s like two weeks and nothing changes, then we need to make a change, then we’re going to change something, right?
We can’t keep doing the same things and expect different results, right? We got to make some changes. So we use the scales feedback. But we can’t see this, this change if we weigh ourselves, you know, once a week or once a month, we won’t be able to keep track of these things, right?
So if we don’t see any changes in two weeks, we’ll change what we eat. We’re changing our macros. We’re changing how much we’re eating, how often we’re eating, what times are eating, whatever we need to change, we’ll make changes.
I’m always tweaking my clients’ nutrition regimen when we hit some sort of stall, and we know this will happen. I know it will happen. It happens with every single person, I expect it. It’s all part of the process. You know, my favorite thing with clients? They probably hate it. But it’s like, this is all a fun experiment, isn’t it? But it’s true. It’s just a fun experiment.
There’s not one solution that works for everyone. So we keep working on it. We keep tweaking things, we keep making changes until we get the results we’re after. We never ever, ever give up. We always use that data as feedback and then we course correct. This is why it’s so important to weigh yourself every day.
You got to notice these trends, and then we can make changes accordingly. If you weigh yourself once a month or whatever, it’s just not enough data. Right? It’s just not going to tell us the whole story. So we want the data so we can, like, you know, do science, you know, this is basically like how we do science where we have a hypothesis, we set up an experiment, we test it, we measure our results, and then we make changes. And we try a different experiment.
Right? There’s no drama in science. There’s no crying in baseball, there’s no drama in science, right? Here’s what I want you to do instead of all the drama. So let’s say we’ve started weighing ourselves every day, we’re starting to get used to it. You know, you start writing down all these feelings that are coming up, you start getting used to that, like you’re starting to, like, see what’s happening with your mind.
And you’re starting to, you know, have a little bit of resilience around all this stuff. We also want to focus on all the other things. Let’s forget about the scale for a minute. Right, your weight going down is just one indicator that you’re becoming healthier. It’s one data point, what about all the other stuff?
You know, we tend to focus just on weight, how much we weigh, but your weight is often the last thing to change. Like there are a number of cool things happening in your body hormones being regulated, blood sugars leveling out, insulin levels coming down. Fat is being used as an energy source. All these things are happening, these amazing changes in your body.
Losing weight is usually the last thing to change. So let’s focus on some of the nonscale victories. You know, you’re feeling better, you’re less bloated, you’re less inflamed, you have more energy, you’re sleeping better. Running is getting easier, your workouts are improving, you’re starting to run faster, and your endurance is improving.
You’re recovering faster from these harder workouts. Your clothes are fitting better, looser, starting to get a little loose, you’re not so hungry all the time. You have improved focus and concentration, maybe you just feel happier. Maybe you just feel better about yourself. These are all amazing, healthy changes.
But we just tend to focus on the scale and then we create all this drama around it. So I want you to stop it with all the scale drama. Okay, just stop it. And hope you still love me. I mean, sometimes I gotta drop a little bit of tough love on you guys. But I hope you still can love me through this stuff.
Stop it with the scale drama. Weigh yourself every day, just get used to it right accept the fact that your weight will fluctuate every day. This is normal, it means you’re a normal human being. How about that doesn’t mean anything negative about you at all. You’re beautiful, you’re worthy, you’re more than good enough. You’re amazing. Focus on the good stuff. Okay. As always, lots of love to every single one of you. Keep on Running Lean, and I’ll talk to you soon.
If you’ve tried to lose weight by running miles and miles or starving yourself and you’ve had zero results, you are not alone. This model of weight loss is broken. It’s never worked, and it has to be replaced. That’s why I created a powerful new training just for you called How to Become a lien running machine. You’ll discover why running more and eating less does not work for weight loss and you’ll learn the three secrets to losing weight and keeping it off for good to get this free training right now just go to runningleanpodcast.com/lean and learn how you can become lean running machine.
Making lasting changes like permanently losing weight is not an easy thing to do. It requires you to do more than just change a behavior. Any kind of meaningful, lasting change requires three …
Continue Reading about 65. The Three Requirements for Making Lasting Change →
My name is Patrick McGilvray, and I’m an experienced marathoner, ultra runner, Sports Nutritionist, Master Life Coach, and weight loss coach for runners. I’ve dedicated my life to helping runners just like you properly fuel your body and your mind. So you can get leaner, get stronger, run faster, and run longer than you ever thought possible. This is Running Lean.
Well, hey there, and welcome to episode 65 of Running Lean. My name is Patrick McGilvray, sports nutritionist personal trainer, health and fitness expert, and the weight loss coach for runners. And today we’re talking about the three requirements for making lasting change.
So making lasting changes like permanently losing weight, is not an easy thing to do, it requires you to do more than just change your behavior, it requires you to do more than just change what you’re doing. Any kind of meaningful, lasting change requires these three key things and you have to have all three, or it just won’t work.
Think of it like a three-legged table. You know, if you’re missing one of the legs, the thing just falls over. It does not stand up on its own, you need all three to make meaningful, lasting changes in your life. So in this episode of the podcast, I’m going to share the three requirements for making lasting change and show you where you can find all three of these things in one place.
If you haven’t already done so please go check out the Running Lean community on Facebook. It is a fun group of runners who are encouraging one another positively, support one another, and ask great questions. And all are sharing similar health and fitness goals. And I’ve got something big coming this Sunday in the Running Lean podcast community.
On Facebook, I do a live training or a Q&A session every Sunday afternoon. And I’ll tell you more about that at the end of this episode. But you will want to pay attention to the end of this episode when I talk about that because it’s a fun little surprise for you. So just go to Facebook and search for Running Lean community and join us over there. It’s fun, we have so much fun.
All right, I’m gonna just jump right into this here the three requirements for making lasting change. So whenever we set out to make some kind of big change in our life, we focus on one thing we focus on, what do I need to do? We focus on action or behavior, what action do I need to take?
So we go to Google, we go to YouTube, and we search how to do blank, right? How-to videos are arguably the most-watched content on YouTube, right? Just tell me what to do. And I can do it right. So the first requirement for any kind of lasting change is knowing what to do this is important, okay, but it’s not the whole picture.
But knowledge is that first leg of the table, that’s the first thing that we need, in order to make any kind of lasting change in our life. So knowledge is important. Here’s how it plays out for a lot of people. Let’s say you’re a runner, just hypothetically, and you’ve been gaining weight over the last few years. Again, just hypothetically, right?
Actually, this is very common, by the way, especially as we get older, so you’re not alone at all. This is me too. So I feel ya. Let’s say you’re a runner, you’ve been getting some weight. You’re still logging a lot of miles each week. So it’s not the running, we know this, it’s your diet, you change your diet, right?
So you decide you’re like, okay, I’m gonna change my diet, I’m gonna lose the weight. I’m committed to doing this. I’m ready. I’m serious this time. So you go to Google, and you type in weight loss, and oh, my god, they do this. I encourage you to do this because I don’t think I’ve ever done this before.
But I just did it just to see what would happen. I typed in weight loss in Google and it came back with almost 3 billion results on the internet. 2,970,000,000 results in 1.4 seconds, by the way, so Google good job and you know, indexing everything on the internet is crazy. 3 billion results for weight loss.
People tell me that figuring out what to do is overwhelming. I just said I can prove this just by going to Google and typing in weight loss. It is overwhelming. I mean, that’s beyond overwhelming, right? It is incredibly confusing. There are so many different diets, so many weight loss supplements, so many meal replacement drinks, and bars and shakes and pills, and it goes on and on and on.
But let’s just say like you find something that sounds good to you like the Paleo diet, and I’m a fan of the Paleo diet, I think it’s pretty good. You know, because it’s based on human evolution, you know, how we evolved, eat over the last two and a half million years or so. So let’s just say you’re like, you know, I’m gonna give this a go.
And so maybe you find a website and some blog articles and you read some stuff, maybe you buy a book, and they tell you exactly what to do. And you start following the plan. And it seems to be working, okay, it works, okay, for a few weeks, maybe you lose a few pounds. But then everything comes to a grinding halt, the scale stops moving, you get frustrated, and you end up quitting, because you know what, that diet doesn’t work.
So then what do you do? You go back to Google, you type in weight loss, and you get a scour through another 3 billion results and try to find something else that works, right. This is not a made-up story. This is not make-believe, this is exactly what I’ve done. This is exactly what I did.
And this is exactly what I hear from runners every single day who try to lose weight, and they fail time and time and time and time again. It’s exactly what they’ve done too. So knowledge is great. Like, you have to have the knowledge, right? You have to know what to do. But it’s not the whole picture.
You know, you may know what you need to do. But what happens when it stops working for you? Or why like, why can’t you make it work beyond a couple of weeks? Why can’t you make these changes last? You know, it’s just because knowledge alone, it’s not enough, it’s only one leg of the table. And without all three, this table of lasting change is not going to stand up on its own.
So just knowing what to do, it’s not enough to make these kinds of lasting changes, especially when it comes to things like completely changing your diet and losing weight and making it a permanent change. Right. So knowledge is good, it’s definitely required. It’s invaluable. You have to know what to do, but it’s not the whole story.
The next thing that is absolutely required, if you want to make any kind of meaningful lasting change is the second leg of the table is support. Okay, so once you know what to do, you can get to work on taking action on changing your behavior on doing what you need to do. And maybe you’ll start getting some results. So that’s the knowledge piece.
But then, what do you do when you encounter an obstacle. And I will promise you right now, that if you want to do something big, like change your diet and lose weight, something that it’s been really, really hard for you in the past, you will encounter obstacles along the way. You cannot accomplish anything meaningful without failing a bunch of times on your way to getting there.
Every success is built upon a pile of failures, we expect failure. In fact, we embrace it, we know that it’s part of the process. But that’s not what most people believe. Most people look at failure as the end. They say, look, the scale stopped moving, I have failed. This diet is a failure. I am a failure and they quit. I see this all the time. Failure is not the end. It’s just a step. It’s one step along the path to success.
But most people don’t see it this way. They fail once and it’s just game over. They’re done. Why? Because they don’t have the support. They need to get them through the failures. So knowledge is great, but without the proper support, making big changes last is incredibly difficult. Without the proper support, you don’t know what to do when things go wrong.
You know, what do you change? Do you change your macros? Do you eat more carbs? Fewer carbs? Do you run harder? Should you eat more often? The guys at the gym telling me I should be eating eight times a day should I be doing that? Should I be eating once a day like should I run 60 miles a week instead of 20? What do I need to do? I need some support.
So without the proper support, it can be very frustrating and confusing. So you need some sort of a support system to help you navigate all the stuff that comes up when you want to make a big change, like changing your diet and losing a bunch of weight.
So what’s the best support system? Well, honestly, the best support system you can have is, is someone that’s already got what you want somebody that can support you, who already has been there, done that, figure it all out, and they can show you the way, a guide, a mentor, someone who has the experience and expertise, expertise to guide you.
And that can always help you make the changes that you need to make so you can keep moving towards your goals. So for example, I have a coach to help me, I actually have two coaches, I have a business coach, and I have a fitness coach. And these two coaches helped me to stay on track.
They show me things that I’m doing, or they show me how I’m thinking that I cannot see, you know, we all have blind spots. There are things about the way that I think sometimes that I think is just the way it is like, oh, yeah, this is just, you know, the way it is. And then my coach will say, Patrick, this is just a thought in your head. You’re just making this stuff up. And I’m like, Oh my God, you’re right.
So a lot of times, a good coach will show you what you can’t see about yourself, which is really, really important. You know, but most importantly, my coaches helped me overcome obstacles, they helped me to embrace failure. They helped me to get over it already. And they helped me to keep moving forward. Yes, they pushed me, but in a good way.
So I’m a big believer in coaching. If you want the best support system around, I would say, get a coach who has what you want, and who can offer their experience and their guidance. And all the best heroes think about this. This is awesome. I love this all the best heroes have coaches where they have guides that can show them the way you know, Luke Skywalker had Obi-Wan Kenobi, Frodo had Gandalf, Neo had Morpheus.
And for me, and I just love the nerdy references. And if you do, too, then you’re my people so awesome. For me, I will gladly invest in a coach who can give me the support that I need. While I’m going through these big changes in my life, if I want to accomplish something big, it’s so worth it to me to invest in someone that can help get me there faster, without all the frustration and the can support me now.
That being said, you don’t have to invest in a coach. Honestly, if you have a partner that supports you, this is such a great place to start. It can just be a spouse or a family member. Here’s a little backstory, like when I was married, I worked a corporate job, I worked this job for 16 years, doing the same thing. And over and over every single day, 16 years.
And at one point, I was like I’m done with this. And I really wanted to set out on my own, I wanted to be an entrepreneur, but it was a big change to make. It was scary. Like leaving the safety and security of that corporate job with the health insurance and the paid vacations, and going to be an entrepreneur where you gotta like, you know, hustle and make ends meet.
It’s all up to you. And there are no paid vacations, there’s no health insurance like you got to take care of all that stuff on your own. The idea of leaving that safety net that I had in that job was very, very scary. And I remember one day, I’ll never forget this day, I came home from work and I was so frustrated again, it was another hard day. And I was just exhausted and fed up and angry.
And my wife at the time looked at me and said, I hate seeing you like this. This is no way to live. You need to quit that job. You need to follow your dream of being an entrepreneur, and I fully support you in that. I’m 100% behind you on this, we will make this work together we’ll figure it out.
When she told me that I was floored because I didn’t think I’d ever be able to quit that job. But suddenly I’m like, filled with this conviction and confidence. Because I had that person supporting me. And that’s exactly what I did. Like the next day I went in and I gave my notice and I quit that job and I never looked back.
So support is so important to have like you’ve just got to have somebody that’s supporting you or some sort of support system. Okay. So we’ve got two legs of our table. Now we’ve got the knowledge, okay, you need to know what to do. You need to know how to do it and We’ve got the support. So we’ve got someone to guide you, you got your Obi-Wan Kenobi, to somebody show you the way to help you overcome the obstacles and the failures.
And this brings us to the third, and maybe the most powerful of all three of these requirements for making lasting change. And that is accountability. The definition of accountable is an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions. So I love this, I love that it’s a willingness to accept responsibility for your own actions. How are you at taking responsibility for your own actions? Who did that just make you cringe a little? If it did, you are not alone. Most people are not good at this.
Most people do not do well when left to do things on their own. Most people do not succeed with something like losing weight when they try to do it on their own. This is why Weight Watchers was such a great concept early on.
So they were mostly these accountability groups, right where you would have to, you know, check-in each week and share, you know, with everybody, whether you stuck to your plan or binge down on French fries all week, like you had to show up and be accountable.
And the rest of the group was there to hold you accountable, and to support you as well, right. So very effective, very effective. And all kinds of support groups are like this, its support is important. But it’s that accountability, it’s just showing up. That is so important that you have to report to someone.
Another great example of an accountability group, and this is, my favorite one is my running group. So my running group, we meet every Tuesday evening and Saturday morning for these group runs. And I usually can’t make the Tuesday evening workout workouts because I’m coaching people in the evenings.
But Saturdays, I block out that time every Saturday to show up to run with the group. And this is when we do our long runs. And I promise you that if it were up to me alone, I would not get out of bed at six o’clock on a Saturday morning in the winter when it’s cold outside and dark outside to go run like 20 miles by myself. I’m telling you right now, I would not do that. I would not have run the number of marathons and Ultras if I had just left been left to try to do this all on my own.
I just don’t think I would have done it. But I know when there’s a bunch of people counting on me to be there that are expecting me to show up because I said I’m going to show up. I’m there every single time every Saturday morning, I never miss those group runs. The accountability is so important.
And when I ask people, because I talked to people about this all the time, I talked to people who are struggling to make changes on their own. And I always ask them like, why is it so hard for you to make this change on your own? How come you can’t stick with your diet plan? Or how can you stick with the exercise program? What is so hard about this? Why can’t you do it on your own?
The number one reason I get from people, the number one reason why they can’t stick to something is they have no accountability. They tell me this every single day. They have no one to report to. They have no one holding them accountable. They have no one that’s making them take responsibility for their own actions. They have no one pushing them.
There’s this incredible power in accountability. I did this little bit of research when I was looking up the information for this podcast. And I found this interesting study by the American Society for Training and Development. And they did this study where they were trying to measure the power of accountability. And they found that people who took action toward a particular goal so you know, they had all these people that had a goal.
And the people that took action on that goal had around a 25% success rate in achieving that goal, right, not bad. But the people who had a goal and who took action on that goal and who had an accountability partner, and had the scheduled appointment with that accountability partner.
These people had a 95% success rate. Basically, a done deal, right? That’s so fascinating to me that accountability and having somebody to check in with on a regular basis is the difference between hitting your goal about a quarter of the time or basically almost 100% of the time. And when I’m working one on one with a client, we have a standing weekly check-in, I’m holding them accountable every single week, did you stick to your plan or no?
And guess what, pretty much everyone always sticks to their plan, there’s a very, very few compliance issues with my coaching clients. Because people are just much more likely to stay on plan when they have to report into me each week, and they even tell me this, they’re like, I was gonna, like, give in and eat this whole chocolate cake because I was, you know, having an emotional moment or something.
And then I thought, I’ve got to talk to Patrick later today. So I’m just not going to do it, you know, because I don’t want to show up and tell him that I screwed up or that I, you know, gave in to this urge or whatever. So just having that person there to hold you accountable can be the difference between making lasting change in your life or just throwing in the towel. Find an accountability partner, it doesn’t have to be a coach, but it can be a group or a spouse, or a friend, or a family member, these can all work.
One thing to keep in mind, though, is that sometimes there are issues with people you’re close to like family dynamics, you know, or you know, drama between spouses. And maybe they’re really not as committed to your success as you are, okay. And an accountability group is a great option because you’re surrounding yourself with people who are all doing what you’re doing.
So they share similar goals. And obviously, the best type of accountability partner would be a coach, because they definitely won’t give up on you there. It’s their job to be there for you and to hold you accountable. So it’s in their best interest to hold you accountable as well. So when we talk about making lasting change, this is what it’s all about.
It’s about making changes last permanently, right, anyone can change their diet, or they can start exercising for a couple of weeks, or we see it all the time the gyms fill up in January, and then they’re empty by March. What we’re really after here is permanent, lifelong changes. And there’s no easy path. It’s a challenge. I mean, if it was easy, you’d already have it, you probably wouldn’t be listening to this right now.
But in order to make meaningful changes in your life that will last you have to have all three legs of the table knowledge, support, and accountability. So now the question is, how do you get all three? How do you get the knowledge, support, and accountability that you need to make meaningful, lasting changes in your life, I’m going to make this super simple for you.
I have something that will absolutely give you all three. And this is the Running Lean monthly coaching group. This is my monthly membership program and support group where you get everything you need to make lasting changes in your life. So I’m going to talk about this for a moment here. And I want to say this if you’re the kind of person who listens to this podcast, and you get what you need.
And then you’re like, I’m good to go. I don’t need your membership program. That’s fine. I love that. I come here every single week. And do this for you guys because I want to help you get results. And I teach what I teach here on the podcast and in my Facebook group because I want to help you I really honestly do.
So if this is you and you don’t want to hear about this program, you can stop listening now and go see what Joe Rogan is up to or something, okay. I love Joe Rogan. But he’s kind of not my style, but that’s okay.
But if you’re the kind of person who’s like, I want to learn more about this Patrick, like I want some help. I want knowledge, support, and accountability. I want it all in one place. If that’s you then keep listening because I think this program might just be perfect for you.
Okay, so just for a few minutes, here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna talk about the monthly coaching group. So with the Running Lean monthly group, monthly coaching group program. With this membership program, you get the knowledge so you get my entire library of online training materials. These are self-paced, that you can go through at your own leisure.
There’s the weight loss training course for runners. So this is everything you need to know about becoming a fat-adapted runner, what to eat, what not to eat, how to break through weight-loss plateaus, how to manage hunger and cravings so much more. And I’m always adding to that particular course. And I’m also adding to my training library all the time.
In January, I created a new course called achieving the impossible. This is how to create an extraordinary life by going after unrealistic goals. And I’ve got a ton of great feedback on this course already. So you can go through these training materials on your own, learn at a pace that works for you and your schedule, then you can start implementing these things.
So you have the knowledge, and you can start taking action and changing your behaviors, okay? Then you can take your questions, or maybe your struggles or your failures, you can take these to the support group. So then you get the support and encouragement from, from the group and from me, an experienced sports nutritionist, a personal trainer, and a master life coach.
But it’s not just about support from me, right. It’s about the support from me and the community of people that are like you that are runners who are sharing similar experiences and similar goals, we all come to the group as ourselves with what what we’re going through at the time, like, these group calls are very powerful, we show up and we’re real move or vulnerable.
We share what we’re struggling with. And we offer our support or encouragement, our experience, our strength, our hope. And we lift each other up when we fail, and we help each other to course correct. This is the power of the support group.
Then when we try to do hard things alone, it’s challenging, it’s frustrating. But when we set out to do hard things, and we do it together, it’s motivating it’s energizing, are much more likely to succeed. So much easier when we do it together.
And then with this membership program, you get the accountability to like to stay on track, and always moving towards your goals. If you want to make lasting change, you have to have accountability. And you’re much more likely to stick to a healthy eating plan or an exercise plan if you have to show up and report it to the group.
It’s kind of like Weight Watchers in that way. But a lot cooler, we’re cool. We have fun. You got to show up and check in. How did it go this past week? What did you do? Did you do what you said you were going to do? Wow, that’s powerful right there.
So these are the three biggest reasons why this membership program is so successful, why it’s helping so many people because you get the knowledge, support, and accountability all in one place. And how does it work? Well, we do live group coaching via Zoom with me and your fellow members. So you get the personal guidance and feedback that you need, you can ask questions, and I’ll coach you.
And all these group coaching calls are recorded and archived onto a Members Only website. So you’ll have 24 access to all the recorded coaching calls so that you can catch anything you might miss. You also get access to a private Facebook group where you can ask questions and get help in between the coaching calls.
This is just a very, very cost-effective way to get results. And I have to say this, we have a lot of fun, I believe, I believe so hard that making big changes, like losing weight should be enjoyable. It has to be enjoyable, it has to be fun. If it’s not fun, why are we doing it? Like you don’t have to suffer your way to good health and fitness.
And the group aspect of this program makes eating right losing weight and doing this big thing. It makes it so much more fun. So here’s the thing, I’m opening the spring session of the Running Lean monthly coaching group this Sunday, March 28. And I don’t open the group very often.
So if you’ve been thinking about this, this is the time for you to take action. If you don’t take action now you’ll have to wait a few more months. All right. And just think about how much change you can make in a few months. You can either be like three months into your health journey. Or you can just be like right where you are today.
Three months from now. The choice is yours. So if you want to learn more, and you want to get notified when enrollment opens, it will be on Sunday at some time. Just head over to runningleanpodcast.com/join. Get your name on the list. Okay.
So this is something I wanted to mention earlier and I want to share this with you. I’m doing a live launch event this Sunday over in the Running Lean podcast community on Facebook. Right. So that’s this Sunday, March 28 at 4 pm Eastern Daylight Time, daylight time we change our clocks you guys. Did you know that?
I’m going to do something fun this week that I’ve never really done before, I have a special offer for everyone who attends that live on Sunday. Okay, it’s a little something cool that I’m doing. I’ve never done this before. But it’s, it’s a little way that I want to say thank you for being a part of the group and showing up on that live.
I won’t be offering this fun little surprise to the general public. The only way you’ll know about it and be able to take advantage of it is if you show up on the live training this Sunday in the Running Lean podcast community on Facebook, okay, you will want to get in on this. I promise you, it’ll be really cool.
Okay, so that’s all I got for you today. Remember, head over to runningleanpodcast.com/join and save your spot. And then I’ll see you on the Facebook Live launch event this Sunday. It’s going to be fun, right? It’s fun. We have so much fun. All right, you guys, as always, lots of love. Keep on Running Lean, and I’ll talk to you soon.
If you’ve tried to lose weight by running miles and miles or starving yourself and you’ve had zero results, you are not alone. This model of weight loss is broken. It’s never worked, and it has to be replaced. That’s why I created a powerful new training just for you called How to Become a lien running machine. You’ll discover why running more and eating less does not work for weight loss and you’ll learn the three secrets to losing weight and keeping it off for good to get this free training right now just go to runningleanpodcast.com/lean and learn how you can become lean running machine.
